Thanks to NetGalley and Simon and Schuster Canada for access to this title. All opinions expressed are my own.

Book tagline: A raw, beautiful memoir of a girl born missing an ear, a medical system insistent on saving her from herself, and our culture’s desire to “fix” bodies.

It's probably a relief to the author and publisher that I had this in digital format because of the ocean of tears I cried. Katie Gies takes readers through her memories of her multiple surgeries and her growing up years. Kids and Adults can be so cruel to a child who is experiencing medical traumas. My medical trauma is different than Katie's and I experienced it as an adult woman, her traumas began at the age of four years old. I felt a lot of compassion as I was reading the memoir.

I have noticed a few reviewers who express anger at Katie's parents. This is strange to me because in between the chapters are conversations between the author and her mother looking back at all that occurred. As I see it, the mother expresses regret for what she and Katie's father allowed overzealous physicians to convince them was in the best interest of their daughter. It's very human for us to believe that our medical team are looking out for our best interests. Unfortunately, as Katie relays through her memoir, there are things that the Canadian health system( her experiences are from Ontario in the 1980s/90s) has done and is doing that need to be more considerate of the patient and not just in the pursuit of medical science.

I hope this memoir reaches many Canadian readers especially those in the medical profession.



Expected Publication 04/02/25
Goodreads Review 22/01/25

I absolutely adored this memoir. Beyond Gies' fantastic pacing and prose, the essays and anecdotes highlighted so much internal and external conflict that made me think critically about my own experience as a woman, and how much our physical bodies/looks are pressured or influenced by societal standards, peers, and medicine.

It's taken me a few days to find the words to write a review because of how deeply this book resonated. My heart broke several times for Gies throughout the novel, and she communicated such deep feelings and discussions with so much grace, as well as so much truth. Throughout the book, Gies' maturity and understanding was evident; rather than simply be upset, Gies is upset and gracious toward her parents, skeptical and forgiving of her doctors, and both hurt by and understanding of her peers. Given my own medical trauma, I resonated deeply with her struggles of being promised you can be "fixed" -- even if it's not medically necessary. Gies' points elicited deep reflection not only on how I see her and other women, but myself. Not to mention the standards of our society as a whole.

Wow! I've read a lot of memoirs about life with a disability but this is far and away one of the BEST!! Utterly raw, visceral and moving, Kate Gies shares what it was like being born without an ear and having to go through multiple surgeries as a child because the medical system considered her less than whole, disfigured and in need of 'betterment.' She relates the psychological trauma this had on her growing up and how it continues to affect her image of herself and her body. There were so many lines in this book I highlighted. I am in awe of the way she wrote so poetically about such a painful topic!! 10/10 recommend. This will definitely be one of my favorite books of 2025! Many thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for an early digital copy in exchange for my humble opinions.

Favorite quote (of many):
"My biggest problem growing up was never the missing ear. It was the fixing."

What a biography! As a mom I don"t agree with most of her mother's decisions but it's brilliant how she overcame all of it and became who she is today.

This book has made me think deeply about what and how much power our society attributes to physical looks. I caught myself multiple times wanting to hurl the book across the room because of Gies' parents and how they could be repeatedly putting her through the trauma of surgery. Do I understand their initial choice? Sure. Does that remove the fact that I am disappointed in our current society and how much we attribute to the way we physically present ourselves to our world? No. Gies truly made me think about the power of physical looks and how importance I unconsciously attribute to this aspect of life. Gies knows how to be concise and to the point to get to her message - and throughout that, she made me extremely reflective.