Thank you to NetGalley and The Collective Book Studio for an ARC of this book. I received an advance review copy for free, and I am leaving this review voluntarily.


It was an incredibly ebook short for the price. The jokes were mildly amusing, but nothing stood out to me. It only took about 5 minutes to read the whole thing.

This would be a cute coffee table book or a gift to a plant lover, but not something I would flip through more than once.

Honestly, I'm not sure what to make of this book! It's definitely in the vein of those cute coffee table humor books that are perfect for putting out and letting guests flip through, that I've previously lauded on the topics of art and birds. This volume turns its gimlet eye on houseplants, imagining what each would be thinking about its owner, while ascribing the plants with personality traits, down to astrological signs. Potentially more useful -- and certainly less fanciful -- is the small portion on each plant's edibility. That said, I wouldn't necessarily use this book as an authority, given that aloe vera is listed as being not edible despite the fact that it very much is.

The book covers 42 plants, divided roughly into three groups based on vibe: the popular crowd, the drama queens and the bitches. As with much of the rest of the book, this categorization feels particularly idiosyncratic to the authors. I am willing to accept that my knowledge of houseplants is very minimal tho, and that other readers might flip through this and go, "oh, absolutely!" I did try to keep some houseplants alive during and around the time of the pandemic lockdowns but have since given up, and greatly enjoy the little fake plant my best friend gave me instead. Hilariously, fake plants get the very first entry in this volume!

Each entry comes with a lovely illustration by Elizaveta Frolova, who is not credited by name but whose work was licensed from Shutterstock for this book. The selection she had available may have strongly influenced which plants were showcased in these pages, as the illustrations certainly provide a strong focal point for the collection. The layouts -- presumably by AJ Hansen -- also add to the clean elegance of the book's overall design.

This is a cute little tome that would serve nicely as a conversation starter or a pleasant way to while a few minutes. Perhaps if I had a greener thumb, I'd feel more connected to what it's saying otherwise.

Houseplants And Their F*cked-Up Thoughts by Carlyle Christoff & Elisabeth Saake was published March 7 2023 by The Collective Book Studio and is available from all good booksellers, including <a href="https://bookshop.org/a/15382/9781951412036">Bookshop!</a>

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC. Lol I loved this book! It was so funny and lighthearted, thankfully I only own one houseplant, so it's either plotting to kill me or very depressed. This was a fun read and I'd definitely recommend it.

I found this to be a charmingly clever idea and enjoyed the pacing and sass. Plant parents will get a good kick out of this book because of it's #RELATABLE. This is a perfect option for a quick laugh and would be a lovely coffee table book for the plant lovers in your life. Each plant entry was a good length -- not too long that it became boring, but not so short that if left me wanting more. I felt personally called out by the dialogue on more than one occasion, so this isn't one that I'll soon forget.

This book is short and sweet, completely bingeable, read it in an hour and then display it on the coffee table, a silly gift for a plant lover.
It has truly humorous moments and a fun/interesting structure.
While I understand that the sharp wit throughout this book is meant to be humorous, there are moments when it comes off a bit mean and a bit insensitive to potential readers. Maybe I'm overly sensitive, but jokes where the reader's weight is the punchline aren't funny.
There isn't much more to say about this book and I don't think you're missing out if you don't give it a read. If you are looking for a few mild laughs and a book with pretty illustrations, this might be the one for you.

1 ⭐️

You really have to be into all sorts of plants to enjoy this book, but even then the jokes are pretty lackluster. Their thoughts aren’t exactly “fucked-up” they're just a bit rude. I think I was expecting it to be funnier.

I’m sure there is an audience for this book, it’s just not for me.


**Thank you, NetGalley and The Collective Book Studio for sending this book for review consideration. All opinions are my own.**

This was fucking hilarious. I loved each little tidbit about the plants, even if it wasn't factual information. "Buy a fake one from Potterybarn" for the fiddle fig made me cackle!

OMG! This book is a riot. Though small in size it packs a punch and as someone who has experience growing up with many a houseplant the thoughts seem pretty accurate. I love the format that mimics a typical plant book, and especially love the inclusion of each plants zodiac sign. Definitely a must buy for your snarky, sarcastic plant loving friend or family.

Clever and original and hysterically funny! These plants have plenty to say and it's all delightfully snarky. I hope you have thick skin because they hold nothing back! There's also some useful information mixed in amongst the humor and realistic but cartoonish illustrations, for those who are looking for a smidge of practical plant care advice. A quick read that's perfect for plant lovers, or anyone with a strong sense of self who wonders what their houseplants really think of them. Thank you to NetGalley for providing an eARC of this book, this was my objective review.

Wow! This is probably my favorite thing I’ve read all month and definitely one of my favorites of the year. I really enjoyed the humor and the characterization given to these plants and can’t wait to get my own copy!

Scary Mommies and Hot Messes know the feeling — you kinda want to become a Cool Plant Lady, but like, that sounds like a lot of work.
Instead, read this book and cut to the chase. You hate plants and plants hate you. You’ll chuckle, you’ll like the pretty pictures, and then you’ll get yourself to the craft store and get the gorgeous silk-and-poly ones you’d never keep alive on your own. And you’ll keep them forever, so as a bonus, you can splurge on a cute little pot, too 😉
Thank me later.

I thought this book was short and sweet, but still cute. It definitely had some plant care information sprinkled throughout. The plants' thoughts were super entertaining to read.

Loved this hilarious and actually helpful book so much! I was wondering what my plants thought. This seems to be spot on. Love the art too.

This was not my cup of tea. The concept was cool, but it ended up becoming very repetitive very quickly, as I think the author came to realize that there simply weren't enough ways to make "watering instructions" and "edible/nonedible" funny. The art was nice though.

Thank you NetGalley for this arc! This was a really fun and funny book with great illustrations. A great “just for fun” gift for a plant lover with a sense of humor

Now I understand why I can’t keep plants alive! That said, this was a fun, light read that I thoroughly enjoyed.

This book is an absolute riot! I never thought my houseplants could be so savage and sassy, and now I can't help but laugh every time I water them—totally a must-read for plant lovers!

Loved this take on plants! I couldn't help but laugh out loud and I love the astrological sign tie in! This is a great book for plant lovers as well as plant killers!

This was such a trip!😂Like, who knew my houseplants could be SO shady?! I always knew they were silently judging me, and now this book just confirms it—totally hilarious but also kinda terrifying!😱🌱 This is definitely the kind of book you give your plant-obsessed friend who low-key treats their plants like their babies. It’s snarky, sassy, and just full of those “I-can’t-believe-my-plant-hates-me” moments. 🌿💚 It’s one of those funny, light reads that’ll have you laughing out loud. Plus, it’s the perfect coffee table book. 💁‍♀️

It’s a quirky little gem I didn’t know I needed, but I’m so glad I read it. Now, I’ll never look at my plants the same way again—those leafy divas are savage! 🌿🌵 Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC!

This isn't funny because your houseplants hate you. It's funny because your houseplants are hilariously mean. So many insults, and very personal. This would be a great gift for someone who enjoys houseplants or someone who just enjoys sarcasm. Thanks to NetGalley for letting me read this.