This book was a very easy read, but I found it to be somewhat monotonous at times. So much that I found myself skimming over paragraphs here and there.

The premise of the book, mental health struggles coupled with sex addiction, really intrigued me. The book had such potential, but it lacked substance. Mental health concerns are on a rise across the country, so this would have been the perfect opportunity to delve into more of the "nitty-gritty". Additionally, it would have been nice if the author touched more on Clare's interactions and relationships with her children. The sex scenes were definitely spicy and did NOT seem mundane and repetitive.

Thank you to NetGalley for the opportunity to read this ARC in exchange for my honest opinion/review.

I kept wondering, as I read Amanda Verrall’s absorbing but discomforting account of a woman’s sexual obsessiveness how the novel would be received by a female reader of mine who once took me to task for a review I’d written in which she felt I’d not been sufficiently understanding of a female character with some of the same propensities as Verrall’s Clare – a charge to which I freely acknowledge guilt.
Might my female critic, I wondered, be as put off as Clare by the one seemingly decent male she hooks up with (particularly painful it was for me as a would-be-sensitive-male to see how dismissive Clare is of him) or might she, like Clare, prefer the rougher, even out-and-out dangerous sorts she connects with.
Not that Clare has any illusions about herself, freely acknowledging that for all her high-level auditing job she's a nymphomaniac and an alcoholic and a pill-popper and likely manic-depressive with an eating disorder that has her regularly disgorging herself.
So disgusted is she, indeed, with her behavior, that she has come up with an alter ego (hence the title) to whom she attributes her worst behavior and from whom the novel further distances her by rendering those parts in the third person rather than Clare’s first person.
The fault of men, no doubt, my female critic as well as a sizable portion of the female population will feel, how worthless she has been made to feel, something else I’m fully prepared to concede. Or, and this by no means excludes the other, she might be genuinely psychopathological, with how throughout the novel she wonders what’s wrong with her and the novel does begin and end with her in a psychiatric facility where she has been placed by a female clinician sympathetic enough that she’s hardly Nurse Ratched.
It’s a question to be decided, how exactly to regard her, by individual readers of this novel which, particularly with its fine writing, makes for provocative if disconcerting reading for contemporary women as well as for men who would be instructed in female psychology.

review incoming 👠🌃🔞 .ᐟ

(ARC kindly provided via NetGalley in exchange for an honest review)

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I try and start off every review with the positive so I will start of by saying I LOVED and lived for the whole concept of the MFC dealing with mental illness and it wasn’t written to be quirky, I often see it done in books where the author makes it a cute little quirk when in reality it’s not. I can’t believe I’m saying this as person who read books that’s romance based. I’m glad this wasn’t ALL about her love life specially. I feel like it would’ve taken away from the story so I applaud the author for that. I was intrigued by this book from the moment I read the description and I can’t say that I’m disappointed. It was interesting enough that I don’t feel bad for taking days to finish the book (I’ll be touching on that soon).

Now onto the “bad”, I had a few issues with this book and that’s why I’m giving it 3 stars (I’m still currently trying to figure out my own personal rating system).

1. We have a woman constantly speaking down on other women and giving off major pick me vibes honestly. Every time I read some ridiculous comment made by her, I had no choice but to say out loud “OMG I’m not like other girls :p”. Now don’t get me wrong, we have our personal opinions but it seemed like every time she mentioned women in general, it was always about putting herself above them because she worked full time and had her children and still managed, NOT WELL I must add so that makes her better than them. She said herself that she always made her children quick to heat up meals but went all out for a man and those same children, she didn’t even have FULL time. That’s just a personal issue of mine.

2. This woman lacked self respect and relied heavily on a man’s approval which makes the comments about other women make SO much sense. I had a bit of trouble keeping up with her honestly, one moment she felt unstoppable then the next she hated herself which is realistic I guess for some women unfortunately but It was hard to keep up because you never knew if you were going to get her feeling herself or her absolutely hating herself.

3. IT GOT SO REPETITIVE to the point where it got a bit boring. It was like a game of tug of war, she would go through these emotions like a never ending cycle and after a while it was like OKAY WE GET IT, can you please make your mind up now on how you’re going to feel about this? It was back and forth and back and forth. I had to stop reading for a few days as I got busy AND I knew at this point that there was going to be a tug of war game waiting for me.

While I had a few issues, It was still good enough that I don’t regret reading but I wish I would’ve enjoyed it more but that’s fine. The concept alone gets an A, the execution could’ve used a little work.

This had everything that I was looking for and enjoyed the overall feel of the romance element. The characters were everything that I was looking for and thought they were written well overall. Amanda Verrall wrote this well and had adult topics that worked in this universe.

I didn't particularly enjoy this book, but that doesn't mean that is a bad book. The story of a woman suffering from feelings of emptiness and low self-esteem, searching to get some sort of control and pleasure in her life is a hard one to read. Watching Clare morph into Roxy, her hard drinking, sex driven alter ego, and then back again into her everyday OCD, bulimic self was difficult for me - and may be triggering for many out there.
This debut novel from Amanda Verrall was well written, and tackles a difficult subject honestly and objectively. I feel harsh only giving three stars as it probably deserves more, but I found the subject matter unsettling and upsetting.

I Plead Alter Ego by Amanda Verrall

Blurb

Clare is a successful but newly divorced woman who battles various mental health issues. These include sex addiction, alcoholism, OCD, an eating disorder and depression. She juggles her demanding career and life as a single parent, all the while trying to hide her increasingly uncontrollable behaviour, which manifests itself as an alter ego called Roxy.

At the dawn of a new digital age, Clare joins Facebook, a newly released social media website that has taken over from MySpace, where she connects and meets with a former flame. Following an emotionally sadomasochistic dalliance with this former lover, Clare then has a string of casual sex encounters with strangers. She has a growing drink problem that sees the alter ego Roxy take over the decision-making, often leading Clare into dangerous situations. Her growing dependency displays itself through obsessive-compulsive traits such as excessive cleaning, exercising and handwashing while, at night time, she has insomnia and often thinks about death.
Clare spirals out of control and falls into a deep depression, but can she hope to find a way out?

My thoughts:

I had high hopes for this book when I came across it and thought that it would grab me on an emotional level. However, I did find for me personally that, especially within the first half of the book, I struggled to connect with main character. This was due to her leaning to men to gain validation for self-worth and it became repetitive. There will be people that can relate to this feeling, however for me I felt it could of benefitted from going more in-depth on the reasons behind Clares issues.

The book addressed how the character struggled with self worthlessness by resorting to alcohol, binge eating and meaningless sex.

The most relatable part for me, was the characters struggles with hiding her real personality and battling to survive each day. This is the case for a lot of people, who struggle to find a balance between masking their true selves and dealing with personal issues on a daily basis. People stay in jobs and places out of necessity and comfort zones not passion, whilst dealing with ongoing issues.

Overall, I feel the book dealt with difficult topics and was a good read. I feel the author addressed the highs and lows of mental health well, alongside other factors.

"Thank you Troubador for providing this book for review consideration via NetGalley. All opinions are my own".

I’d like to thank NetGalley for the opportunity to read I Plead Alger Ego. The premise intrigued me, but I found the execution a bit lacking. The story revolves around a woman grappling with addiction, an eating disorder, and the challenges of a midlife crisis. While these themes are deeply poignant, the constant repetition of her struggles can feel monotonous.

The main character’s internal dialogue, while reflective of her turmoil, often comes across as self-absorbed. I wished for a deeper exploration of how her actions impacted her children and those around her, as it felt like her world was very insular. Unfortunately, I didn't connect with her, and her character development felt sporadic at best.

Overall, I Plead Alger Ego has its moments but could have benefitted from more depth in its supporting characters. I’d rate it 3 stars, as it has potential, but it falls short of creating a fully immersive experience.

I found the themes of this story authentic and powerful. The topics are difficult to read about but important - Verrall portrays mental health through her main character brilliantly. I enjoyed the story. Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.

Gosh, I really, really enjoyed this novel! Reading about Claire, and being immersed in her lifestyle with her multiple addictions was a total escapism read after being in a reading rut lately. This book is high on the spice and pulls at ones emotions at the same time. I look forward to more from this author!!! 4.5 stars

I enjoyed this book for what it was! The book follows Clare/Roxy whose life is upside down. She is an alcoholic and a sex addict. The book itself was well written, I did enjoy how the story wrapped around and concluded with its beginning. The only reason it isn’t 5 stars is because I feel like it was too short to dive into, I found myself slightly skipping over sentences to get to the next thing.