TW: parental death, body horror, sexual harassment, OCD (intrusive thoughts)

Racquel Marie dips her toes in the horror genre with her latest YA novel, If We Survive This. In a post-apocalyptic zombified world, Flora is doing her best to keep her brother and herself alive, but supplies are dwindling and leaving their home for more has become riskier and riskier. Clinging to a final message from their father, they set out to reunite and find safe haven. If We Survive This shifts between the present and the past, adding context to why characters move about the world the way they do, how their perceptions of themselves have changed, and revealing how dynamics between characters have been impacted by a post-apocalyptic backdrop. Flora struggled with OCD and anxiety before rabids, humans who became zombie-like creatures thanks to a mutation of rabies, took over the world. She often felt that her mind was not made to exist in a world where she was always anticipating a problem when most people never had an issue existing in the present. In this new world Flora finds that her ever-racing thoughts have become an asset. She routinely cycles through worst-case scenarios and it makes her more ready to react. In the past it always felt like those close to her were constantly protecting her from herself, but in this danger-filled world, she has become her brother’s guardian. Cain feels like a liability in this world. He isn’t as hard as she is, is more open where she is cautious, and more hopeful when she is realistic. He needs Flora to survive and she needs him to keep going. She has put their survival on her own shoulders, but this journey forces him to see the danger she regularly puts herself in and this creates tension between the two. In a world where you don’t know who you can trust and where death can be just around the corner, letting other people in becomes almost impossible. This becomes more apparent when they happen upon a familiar face. Crisanta grew up with Cain and Flora, being the former’s best friend. But the world is different and everyone has become someone who has done their best to survive. For some this means doing things they never imagined themselves capable of. Flora knows she has changed as a person and can see the world has changed Crisanta as well. Crisanta also opens up a flood of emotion for Flora that she isn’t ready to sift through. The novel does a really good job showing how each character is trying to reconcile who they’ve become in this shattered world while also dealing with the loss of their loved ones and finding a way to still move forward. If We Survive This has a really strong second half, builds up intensity, and has a great core group of characters who you will be rooting for till the very end.

4.5 stars. A lot of the books I have read recently have felt like a hit or miss, but If We Survive This was an absolute HIT.

This book follows Flora and her brother Cain as they attempt to escape their rabid, cannibalistic neighborhood.

It was such a well-written thriller. And also the perfect book for pride month! The characters are so beautifully queer and resilient.

Thank you NetGalley, Macmillan Children’s Publishing Group, and Racquel Marie for this incredible read in exchange for an honest review.

netgalley review**

This was honestly a very interesting read. I will say it took me a little while to get into the book but the ending really drew me in. I will say the flashback tended to make the book slag and it was hard to get through those parts. I also think they were not necessary for the book and we could have found out some of the important plot points through conversation in the present instead of going back every other chapter.
I definitely would say the sibling relationship was the strongest aspect of this story. It was a solid read and good for those leaning towards YA survival.

Sadly I DNFed this book. I just wasnt vibing with it. I think it was just too YA for me. It makes me sad because I love a good zombie book too.

A LGBT-filled post-apocalypse novel set in California, we follow Flora and her brother as they try to find their dad, who left for supplies ages ago and has sent out a radio message that he's still here. Along the way, Flora has to cope with her OCD (Author also has OCD, we love own voices), and they run into an old friend and her party. Lots of insanity happens as they try to get to the location they suspect their father is at, these add-ons in tow.

This novel was a wild ride, split between the normal days of the past and the chaos of the present. We watch Flora fight with her minds, and while OCD is a challenge, OCD with the end of the world sounds like hell, and fight with the rabid, literally rabid, remains of humanity. She also encounters both the good and bad of humans after society collapses.

The story deals with life and death in an interesting way too, Flora struggling with finding the will to keep going, wanting a death that is worthwhile, and trying to find kindness in a cruel world. It was a really good read and a great story, and I was so stressed, and hooked, til the last page.

There is also a dog. The dog survives. Important details here.

I picked this up based on the Yellowjackets comp, but the writing didn't work for me, unfortunately. I did absolutely love the OCD rep, especially as someone who struggles with OCD myself (I truly cannot imagine how I'd fare in the event of an apocalypse, nor do I want to ever be forced to find out). It certainly reads as YA, and I suppose I was looking for more of an upper YA in characterization.

DNF at 5%

Entirely a me issue. I thought I'd eventually be in the mood for a zombie-esque story, but I just couldn't get into it. Love the idea of someone with OCD surviving, and we always need more queer stories.

Thank you to NetGalley and publisher for the opportunity to read and review.

Thank you to NetGalley, author Racquel Marie, and Macmillan Children's Publishing Group: Feiwel & Friends for providing me with a free ARC in exchange for my honest opinion!

I never thought I'd be into ANY sort of zombie story, but watching The Last of Us over the past 2 seasons has changed that. If We Survive This definitely filled the heart-pounding, apocalypse sized hole in my current rotation of reading/watching now that TLOU season 2 is done! This was an extremely gripping story that had me on the edge of my seat the entire time. If a book can have jump scares, this one definitely had some! I could literally picture the events happening on page in my mind as the story unfolded, and I think this would make a great tv series or movie. Marie's writing is vivid and atmospheric, and I appreciated the world she built around the characters. The characters themselves were interesting, if not always fully fleshed out. I felt that things got a bit repetitive throughout the story with Flora's OCD and intrusive thoughts. I appreciated the representation, but it got to the point at the end where I felt that it was distracting a bit and just repeating the same things over and over. Same with Cain, Adan, and Cristina. None of them progressed beyond a certain point in character growth or development for me personally, and I wasn't super emotionally connected to any of the characters. I also thought that the ending with the introduction of conflict and certain characters was a bit jarring and came out of left field. I did enjoy the queer representation though! I think this will definitely be a hit with teen audiences too, since this is a YA read, but there is enough action in it that I enjoyed it as a 27-year-old overall too.

If We Survive This completely pulled me in from the very first page. What I appreciated most was how much heart Racquel Marie poured into this story. It’s not just another survival or "zombie" book; it’s something much more intimate, layered, and beautifully written. The emotional depth of the characters, paired with the constant undercurrent of danger, created a reading experience that had me literally reading while on the treadmill, adrenaline pumping, unable to put it down.

The dual timeline structure was incredibly effective. The shifts between “then” and “now” made the character development feel authentic and earned. Seeing the main character evolve from her younger, more naive self into a grown woman with a much deeper understanding of herself and the world around her made the stakes feel personal and real. The contrast between these timelines was one of the book’s biggest strengths.

Pacing-wise, the structure was smart. Longer chapters early on allowed the world-building and relationships to fully develop, while the shorter, faster chapters toward the end heightened the tension and urgency perfectly. By the time the romance really began to unfold, the pacing gave me space to fully invest in the emotional side of the story, without feeling overshadowed by the action. The LGBTQIA+ representation was handled with care and authenticity. The diversity of the characters felt organic, never performative, and their identities were simply part of who they were, which made their stories even more meaningful.

On top of that, the plot twists and, oftentimes, unreliable narrator kept me questioning everything and everyone. I was never sure who to trust, which only added to the tension and emotional pull of the story.

If We Survive This is a rare kind of survival novel, one that balances action, heart, and character-driven storytelling with incredible skill.

Somehow the author is able to balance her trademark emotional YA with a zombie apocalypse and I loved it. Specifically I found the characters to be relatable, but more than that I found our lead very interesting. Showing how a person with OCD would react to a world where a zombie infection runs rampant was truly a stroke of genius, and then making it somehow relatable to a younger audience was just beautiful.

I wasn’t sure if I was going to like this in the beginning. Some of the wording from the protagonist threw me off. However this book gets stronger with every page. I think the flashback scenes went on for a little long sometimes, but in the end I throughly enjoyed this book. The ending was so special. Mentally ill lesbians with siblings rise up 💪

Thank you to NetGalley for the copy! To those looking to read it, I do think Yellowjackets is a good comparison. and the Last of Us, but specifically the episode with Bill!

Zombie apocalypse stories typically make me squeamish (in film/tv) so I had never thought to read one. However, I saw Racquel Marie speak about this book at YallWest and she mentioned how she gets scared too but reading horror can be easier to handle than seeing it. I'm so glad she said that because it convinced me to read her first horror, and it's incredible! Flora was such a great character to follow. She reminded me a lot of myself which gave me an interesting insight into how I might fair in a situation like this. So fun and thrilling (and scary but I was able to handle it!) Definitely recommend If We Survive This!

Thank you to the publisher and netgalley for providing me with an eARC!

I love literally everything that Racquel writes so I wasn’t surprised by how much I enjoyed it! I’m weird with apocalypse stories because I just cannot understand the mindset of wanting to survive that and I still don’t get it but I loved this take on it! Maybe it’s because I could understand Flora on a very personal level with the ocd and anxiety that basically consumed her life. It was fascinating to read a story about survival from the perspective of someone that has spent their whole life trying to control their fear of death and now having to deal with the very real nightmare of the end of the world. Just a fantastic story, with the perfect open ending (everyone will probably not agree with me on that one though) and a really messy but lovable cast of characters!

If We Survive This is a heart in your mouth YA horror story all about survival and family.

As soon as I heard Yellowjackets meets The Last of Us, I was sold. Luckily, this more than lives up to that comparison with a tense and terrifying read. The stakes feel tangible and the danger is very real, both in terms of the “rabids” and humans alike. Marie creates a wonderfully claustrophobic atmosphere, even as the world opens up on this intrepid journey. It is a horrible world where society has collapsed and the apocalypse has hit, bringing out the worst in some of the people that remain. Marie conveys this darkness perfectly but also adds threads of hope and snatches of happiness. This is not a clear-cut story but it is an ode to survival against the odds and found family that becomes your own community.

At the centre of it all is Flora, battle-tough and weary from fighting for her remaining family. She is smart, determined and deeply loyal with a vulnerability just hidden behind those carefully curated walls. I also really liked the way Marie explored her OCD and anxiety in this environment. It was sensitively explored and nuanced. There are some scenes where she grapples with her survival that are heart-wrenching. In particular, Marie explores surviving when you didn’t want to – that overwhelming flood of emotions where it feels easier to let go. It is poignant and powerful in its honesty. The situation has taken it to the extremity of the zombie apocalypse, but the themes explored are universal and sure to land with readers who may need to hear it.

If We Survive This cuts deep in its character-driven story with some incredible twists and turns – it keeps its heart through the bloody zombie apocalypse.

A cute little found family “zombie” book. Using rabies was a clever way to bring about the apocalypse without reinventing the wheel.

The OCD rep was different and introduced a whole new horror I’d never even thought about in this scenario. Ultimately my only gripe with this book was introducing a “villain” right at the ending and it feeling almost like a different book. It was good and could’ve been introduced earlier

Oh, this broke my heart so many times. It has a searingly accurate portrayal of what it’s like to live with OCD and intrusive thoughts. Flora’s brain is constantly showing her images of herself or her loved ones dying in horrific ways. You know when you’re really frightened for your life? That’s been Flora’s daily reality for years before a rabies mutation turns the majority of the population into “rabids” whose sole purpose is to eat the uninfected. You might she’s made to survive the zombie apocalypse. But at what cost, though!! It has to be extremely exhausting to be in a state of fight or flight all the time. I have some experience with this, having anxiety and intrusive thoughts myself, but nowhere near as severe as Flora. It really breaks my heart that some people go through this their whole lives.

With regard to the plot, Flora and her brother Cain leave LA, planning to reach a cabin they had previously vacationed at, all the way up in Northern California. It’s dangerous to stay…but it’s also dangerous to leave. There are rabids everywhere, and when they run into people who have also managed to survive, they have to ask themselves—what have THEY done to survive…

I honestly love zombie apocalypse stories. I don’t like serious, horrifying, give-you-nightmares horror, like “It” or “Pet Sematary”—but I do love me a good “we must journey across this ruined wasteland full of undead” tale. Call me crazy. It’s just my jam. So this book scratched that itch for me. I will warn you, though…this has TREMENDOUS amounts of blood and gore. Like, buckets of viscera. Slip-sliding in undead goo. You catch my drift?

Thank you to NetGalley and Feiwel & Friends for the advance copy in exchange for my honest review.

I was engaged from the tagline "The Walking Dead meets Yellowjackets" and also from the cover and description, it had that horror element that I was looking for and was engaged from start to finish. The characters were everything that I was wanting and worked well in this universe. The concept was so well done and was invested in what was happening in this. Racquel Marie has a strong writing style and was glad I got to read this.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for this ARC.

This was a very well-written and heart-pounding novel from this author. I really was on the edge of my seat for a lot of the story. The way she writes the book makes it feel like you are in this exact scenario with Flora, our main character. The world-building, as well, is amazing. It was more showing than telling when it came to building this dystopian world that everyone now lives in. We really felt things along with our main characters. Be prepared to have heart-wrenching moments as well. It was not just about surviving this post-apocalyptic world, but also surviving your own inner demons.
I really liked the dynamic and relationship exploration between the siblings Cain and Flora as they navigated this world together in search of their father, whom they believed had sent them a message, thus leading to this main adventure. I also liked the time hopping between when things were normal, so that we could establish their dynamic with their families before the main timeline and the switch to the current timeline. Who these characters are in the current timeline and how they act with one another and themselves is highly dependent on the characterization and establishment of their lives in the past, leading up to this current dystopian world.

This book, particularly Flora herself, took me completely by surprise. The zombie genre already comes with the expectations of exploring survival, but it tends to paint such a large world view with grandness and action that I haven't felt truly settled into an apocalyptic world. Yet, there is something so unbelievably human about this story. It's a story of survival, humanity, mercy, and love that wouldn't shy away from displaying what it means to live in danger every single day. The danger was my first inkling of what this book was capable of, specifically in how none of the characters could be deemed safe. The gore and harsh choices made by everyone isn't simply a reflection of the world, its about how they fit into this new reality.

Flora, at her core, is a sister trying to navigate a world that is everything she could have feared. Her OCD isn't something that can be pushed back any second for the sake of advancing the plot, its there to stay and permeate through her worldview. Flora isn't written for you to simply glance at and think "Wow that's difficult, can't imagine", you are quite literally thrown into her perspective. This and the use of the flashbacks built a character who can't dismiss the way her brain works, but rather forces us to ask how would one survive.

Marie, by utilizing the rabies origin for her zombie lore, brings into question what it means to be human. More importantly, what it means to stay human when you are constantly subverting social expectations. During moments where this is asked, either upfront or subtly, the affection and love found in people is what shined through. Maintaining those little moments of humanity strengthened the emotional gut-punches in this book.

A heavy read that never holds itself back from igniting our real fear of grief and hesitation towards surviving a world that is actively working against it.

Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan Publishers for this free ARC copy in exchange for an honest review!

Thanks to NetGalley and Feiwel and Friends for providing this eARC, and to Colored Pages Book Tours for having me as one of the hosts for this book tour!

Racquel Marie does not disappoint in this incredibly horrific, very grim story, filled to the brim and crafted with so much love!

Throughout this book I was BAWLING my eyes out, and left unable to step away from this story for even a moment!

Please please please check out this incredible book, I promise you won’t regret it!!