2.5 ⭐️

Plot: a group of childhood friends who are now approaching 30 reunite for a weeklong vacation. An emergency early into their trip has them thinking about where their relationships with each other currently stand and how these relationships fit into their adult lives.

Characters: each character has their own distinctive voice, but the entire time I read this book I couldn’t help but wonder why any of these people were friends and how anyone could want to be friends with them. With the exception of maybe 1 character these were all totally unlikeable characters. For me it didn’t seem like any of these characters had any growth at all over the course of the week or since high school. And - even if they were in a different place as adults they reverted back to their immature horrible tendencies once they were all together.

Themes: growing up, friendships, privilege

Writing: pretty strong character writing and some funny moments but not a very strong plot. This book made me feel like I was on the vacation from hell because I was figuratively stuck with these insufferable people for a week. The timeline hops around a bit to give perspective into Clare’s history with the group when they were teenagers and how they relate to one another now.

This story will make you think about how childhood and adult friendships differ and ultimately how you can grow out of friendships as you grow up. I appreciated the perspective that it is important to not let nostalgia be the only thing that holds you together.

Narration: The narrator does a good job. None of her voices are too over the top but she still manages to give a different voice to each character. Good production

This is the second book I've read in a row that compares itself to Fleishman is in Trouble. I didn't get that at all, though I guess it does ask some existential questions about life and marriage. However, I really did enjoy listening to this one and would definitely read more from the author.

The book begins with a group of now 30-year-old high school friends vacationing in Hawaii together when the false missile alert goes off (just like in 2018). It's a kind of wake up call for each person to wonder what they're doing there.

The book is mainly centered on Clare. Clare is the only member of her high school group who is married and she prides herself on being more adult than her friends. But it's clear that Clare is not totally happy with her life and maybe that's why she keeps returning to this group of old friends who have grown apart in many ways. Maybe too many ways? Throughout their week together, there are lots of revelations amongst the friends, several arguments and heated discussions, and much pontificating. We also get lots of flashbacks to their time in high school, so we can see what drew them all together in the first place.

This book comes at an appropriate time as some of it is focused on the political matters of 2018. No names are mentioned (that I recall), but it's clear they're discussing the president at the time and everything they talk about is once again very relevant. Though I'm older than 30, I also appreciated that the book brings up a lot about childhood friendships and their place in adulthood. Can it be enough that we were there for each other and one point in life and had good times together? Should we really try so desperately to hold on to lifelong friendships if we don't have much in common anymore? I feel like everyone goes through this at some point in their life.

Overall, I really enjoyed When We Grow Up!

I tend to enjoy books about groups of high school or college friends who reunite as adults. I love The Big Chill and St. Elmo’s Fire vibes. These friends gather at a fabulous location in Hawaii in celebration of turning 30. However, they don’t seem to have much in common at this point other than their shared past experiences. At times they actually bring out the worst in each other but I still enjoyed their time together. This book is told primarily from Claire’s perspective and I would have liked to have had a glimpse into the perspectives of the other characters. I enjoyed the dual timelines and overall premise though and the narrator was great!

A contemporary story about a group of friends who are suddenly in a situation where they have to reckon with their history and who they are today. This is more poignant than ever considering how the 2024 election turned out. I think this is a quick but thoughtful read that will yield discussion. Thank you to Netgalley and Macmillan Audio for the ARC! When We Grow Up is out 3/4/25!

This was an interesting read.
I didn’t love it but I didn’t hate it.
6 life long friends go to Hawaii to celebrate their 30th. A lot happens, but also nothing happens.
The characters were complex, their relationships with one another, even more so. I wish I liked them better then I did because I struggled to attach myself and it was hard to identify with them.
I found this story pretty random, but I enjoy that in a book. I love when a book is just a moment in time. That’s this book.
Thank you netgalley for the AAC!

This was not what I thought it was going to be. The terrifying news alert was just a blip of the book. Also all the characters were introduced right away in the book and on audio it was very confusing. The time changes were also confusing. I felt like maybe I just did not get some of this book or it was just trying to be "woke" because the author was trying to include a lot of things that really were not relevant to the story. All the characters were unlikable besides Mac which made it hard to want to continue listening. Luckily the narrator was good at telling the story. I think the premise of friendship and who you were when you were younger verse who you are now was interesting. But overall this book was not for me.

another story in the collection about a group of friends turning 30.

Kept together due to shared history, and perhaps a sense of obligation, the six friends from school are all in Hawaii at the same time for a reunion. They have less in common than they used to, and they struggle with whether or not to maintain these friendships. In some ways, they know each other so much better than the people in their current day-to-day lives. In others, they are almost unrecognizable to their childhood friends.

This book has some beautifully constructed sentences, I know that there are going to be a few quotes that will be highlighted and re-highlighted by many who read this book. If you are at a crossroads in your life with your friendships, I’m sure that you will find a lot to relate to. The set up in the premise of being separated from their day-to-day lives while getting a breaking news alert that makes them think that their lives are completely threatened, brings to the surface how quickly we bounce back from thinking everything is over. Who are we really? Are you The core of the person that you were at 13, before you experienced the traumas and insecurities that you did? Is that who you really are? Or are you the composite of lived experience? Do these people know you better than others? Or less?

On audiobook, this was a little hard to follow, there are many characters and it became cumbersome to try and keep them separate, as they were all the same agent in the same friend group. The audiobook narrator is well acted, but it is not the kind of book that is necessarily meant for audio. From an accessibility standpoint, I do think that this would be fine, but personally, I found it difficult to follow the storylines Because there are so many characters and they can be similar.

The characters are relatively unlikable, which makes it difficult to become invested in their story. I do believe that the book asks, interesting and powerful question, and I really do appreciate the set up in premise. It’s not a long book, but it did seem to drag on as it was difficult to follow the time jumps into get into the characterization of all the characters.

Thanks to NetGalley and McMillan audio for an arc of this audiobook to be released February 24, 2025.