The Difference That Makes the Difference by Josh Davis and Greg Prosmushkin is a clear, practical, and insightful guide to using NLP (Neuro-Linguistic Programming) for personal and professional transformation. The authors successfully demystify NLP, blending its time-tested techniques with modern science to help readers understand how and why change happens. Their combined expertise shines through in accessible explanations, step-by-step exercises, and real-world examples that make NLP feel both approachable and effective.

What sets this book apart is its focus on actionable tools that anyone can apply—whether for improving communication, mastering new skills, or positively influencing thoughts and behaviors. The integration of neuroscience and psychology adds credibility and depth, making it more than just a self-help manual. While some concepts may feel familiar to those already versed in personal development, this is a well-structured, comprehensive resource for anyone looking to take control of change in their life. Highly recommended for readers ready to move beyond theory and start making meaningful shifts today.

I didn't really know much about neurolinguistic programming (NLP) before reading this, but I found it rather interesting and something that could be helpful to many people. The authors do state at the beginning that there are people who don't agree with NLP and some evidence that parts of it don't work, but that it can still help many people in learning how to change their language and interactions with others for the better.

The different skills and parts of NLP that are discussed can be used in many interactions: a boss to his employees, a husband to wife, a mother to child. It's using words and observations to make your conversations more meaningful and to help understand each other. Instead of fighting and people saying they don't feel understood, you can use the techniques to get to the heart of matters and solve issues without the fighting or hurt feelings. Now I don't think every technique is useful in every situation, and I'm sure there are people that this just won't work well on, but it is still worth a shot reading and trying to implement some of the techniques in different situations to see if they help. I have studied something similar before at my job in order to find resolutions, so the techniques listed are ones I could try out in different situations to help achieve my goals.

While the authors do their best at making this interesting and humorous, it can get a little dry and repetitive at times. However, I think the overall book is good and would recommend to anyone looking for help in communicating.

I actually thought NLP stood for something different when I requested this book but it turned out to be a happy accident. The concept under discussion, Nuerolinguistic Processing, is quite fascinating. I read arcs pretty fast, so I actually want to come back for this one in print and I've preordered it.

I like this book because it offers a system of communication that can actually be practiced. And I like that NLP basically teaches intellectual empathy, or how to think like the person you're talking to.

I couldn't pick up everything this book has to offer on the first pass. For example, it contains a wealth of writing and reflection exercises that I look forward to in my next pass.

I recommend this one to people who would like to communicate more effectively or learn more about how people communicate.

Thank you to the authors Josh Davis and Greg Prosmushkin, publishers St. Martin's Essentials, and NetGalley for an accessible digital arc of THE DIFFERENCE THAT MAKES THE DIFFERENCE. All views are mine.

Special thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for a free, electronic ARC of this novel received in exchange for an honest review.
Expected publication date: July 8, 2025
Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) is gaining in popularity as of late, although it does have its critics, so it is likely that if you haven’t heard about it yet, you soon will. In its basic form, NLP is the process of understanding what makes people tick. A combination of psychology and linguistics, NLP helps us understand how the words others say (and how they say them) and how to use this understanding to “slightly encourage” other people to see things our way.
Josh Davis is the author of “Two Awesome Hours: Science-Based Strategies to Harness Your Best Time and Get Your Most Important Work Done” and is an expert in the field of NLP. Greg Prosmushkin is a trial lawyer who realized the positive impacts NLP had on his professional work. In “The Difference That Makes the Difference: NLP and the Science of Positive Change”, the two join forces, combining their knowledge and presenting it in a generalizable, digestible format that appeals to a wide audience.
“Difference” was informative, helpful and, in parts, humorous, and both authors found ways to connect to their audience (which, considering they wrote this specific book, I would question their knowledge if they were unable to influence readers in some capacity) while providing them with information on a very divisive topic.
I did not know much about NLP going into this, so all the information was almost brand-new to me. Those who have had some experience with the process may have a different opinion but, as a newbie, I found the concept fascinating. Normally, I breeze through self-help books, exhibiting long, drawn-out eye rolls in between chapters but “Difference” managed to pique my curiousity. Not every part was as relevant to me, nor did I buy in to every module, but there was enough new and pertinent information to keep me paying attention (and taking notes).
NLP seems to be quite the complex process, but the authors of “Difference” present it in a way that is both compulsively readable and actually easy to understand. If you have always been stymied by what seems to be an external force, or just have a general interest in the process of NLP, “Difference” provides an examination of NLP that covers all the necessary information.

This is a self-help book good for those who need to take a breath before opening their mouths. The authors do a good job of convincing you to see situations from other people's perspective and to think about how someone else may view a scenario. I appreciated the depth of this book and will certainly use it in my everyday life.

With that said the book seemed a little too aimed at getting ahead yourself. If this is where you are and what you're looking for, it's great. But if you are a little less focused on getting your own way all the time, not so much.

Overall, it was a good book!

The Difference That Makes the Difference by Josh Davis and Greg Prosmushkin really opened my eyes to how NLP can actually work in everyday life. I wasn’t super familiar with NLP before, but this book breaks it down in a way that’s easy to follow and not overwhelming. The authors mix science with practical tips, which made the whole thing feel useful instead of just theory.

What I appreciated most was how the book focuses on positive change in a way that feels achievable. It’s not about quick fixes but about understanding yourself better and shifting your mindset. Some parts made me stop and think about my own habits and how I could tweak them to improve things.

If you’re curious about NLP or just looking for ways to bring more positive change into your life, this book is a solid place to start. It’s thoughtful, clear, and approachable, and it definitely left me with some new ideas to try out.

Reads more like a pop culture "Here's what NLP is and some history", which is fine. The authors state in the introduction that this is "not a workbook". Which that in mind, a good read.

The Difference That Makes the Difference explores the science behind positive change through Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP). Davis and Promushkin provide an accessible and engaging explanation of NLP fundamentals while introducing additional methods that enhance its effectiveness.
The book delves into key concepts like reframing and modeling excellence, demonstrating how this behavioral science can improve communication and boost confidence. Backed by science and real-world examples, it offers valuable insights into understanding how we—and others—think. Whether you're new to NLP or looking to deepen your understanding, this book provides a practical and thought-provoking guide to mastering positive change.

Thank you NetGalley and St. Martin's Essentials for the advanced reader copy.

The Difference That Makes the Difference is a practical and empowering guide to creating meaningful change using the principles of Neurolinguistic Programming (NLP) and modern behavioral science. Drawing from the authors’ diverse backgrounds—Greg Prosmushkin’s real-world application in law and entrepreneurship, and Josh Davis’s academic expertise in psychology and neuroscience—the book demystifies NLP and presents it as a powerful toolkit for improving communication, boosting confidence, and taking control of personal and professional growth. The authors do a strong job of making complex concepts approachable and actionable, making this a valuable read for anyone seeking concrete strategies for self-improvement.
Rated four stars, this book offers readers a motivating roadmap for change, supported by science and real-world examples. While some parts may feel overly promotional or simplified for those already familiar with NLP, its accessibility and clarity make it an ideal starting point for newcomers. The Difference That Makes the Difference encourages readers to stop waiting for transformation and start actively creating it—one mindset shift and skill at a time

"The Difference That Makes the Difference" is an incredibly informative and insightful book that manages to take a complex and nuanced technique—rooted in neuroscience, psychology, or high-performance behavior—and make it remarkably approachable for readers at all levels. Davis and Prosmushkin have a talent for breaking down sophisticated ideas into digestible, actionable steps, making this a rare kind of guide that is both intellectually enriching and practical.

The book includes many real-world examples. The authors don’t just explain theory—they show how it applies in everyday life, from workplace productivity to personal decision-making. These examples make the content relatable and help the reader see exactly how to integrate the principles into their own routines and challenges.

Ultimately, this is an enormously helpful book. Whether you’re looking to improve your focus, make better decisions, or simply understand how small shifts in behavior can lead to big outcomes, "The Difference That Makes the Difference" offers a roadmap worth exploring. I highly recommend it to anyone instead in learning about this technique.

Disclaimer: I was given an advance copy of this book by the publisher in return for an honest review.

As introductions to NLP go, this is pretty good. It’s comprehensive, easy to read, and well structured, making it ideal for both novices and those with a little knowledge. It’s been a while since I took my NLP training course, so I found it a great refresher. I particularly liked that they were skeptical about some of the aspects of NLP I’ve always found troublesome (that whole thing about eye movements, for example). They also note that some of the techniques I was taught and was dubious about are just methods you can try, but they’re not fundamental aspects of NLP.

They bring out well the most important aspects of NLP: mental models, the necessity for precision and clarity of thought, the importance of reframing, and the practical ways to use those techniques either for self-help or for helping others. And, since David is a trained neuroscientist, they explain things in terms of the actual processes that occur in the brain, which appeals to me. NLP is, after all, a tool for rewiring the brain and changing its default reactions to things.

That said, there were two things I found slightly irritating. First, the way they refer to the two authors in the third person feels awkward: Josh had this experience, and Greg had that experience… It feels like I’m reading a book about them, not by them. It would have worked better if the individual anecdotes had been separated from the main text in some way and told as first-person stories.

I also found there was too much emphasis on business: it was all about success in meetings, negotiations, handling clients, legal trials, and so on. While that’s all valid, I would have preferred if it had kept things more personal. I like to think of NLP as a tool for understanding myself and others, not a career success methodology. (It’s too late for that anyway - maybe thirty years ago I’d have thought differently!)

On the whole, though, I’d very much recommend this book to anyone who’s interested in the topic, especially if you’re dubious about the idea of investing a bunch of money in a training course.

Food, fat, and flavor start with the same letter for a reason. I'm deeply anti-diet. This book crystalizes my objections to the diet industry's be-afraid-of-your-food message, its relentless focus on women and the concomitant relentless bombardment of negativity about appearance, or more stealthily but with the same objective, relentless "health" messaging that is anything but healthy.

The author is a social-media Force. She's got followers in droves...legions...and she's been giving this very practical method to get yourself into a healthy, sustainable pattern of eating the food you enjoy for a while now. I hadn't heard of her because I'm not all that interested in diets except to belittle and insult the anti-food goblins that perpetrate and perpetuate the anti-food messaging that damages so many people.

What else can I say? If you think you need a diet book, you really need this book. Skip the "one weird trick" fads, spend your time and your treasure here. Author Soto is Cicero to the Br'er Rabbits that abound in this space. She spends a deal of her page-count telling stories about those who've used her method...CHULA, explained above...to mend their fractured relationship to food. There's a lot of informative and explanatory text, so it's not just a paper version of an infomercial; the aim was to recreate her social-media presence's warm, approachable presentation of self. I found it effective, and agreeable, where I expected to feel it was kinda cringe.

*I*, a certifiable curmudgeon with a long-standing hatred of the dietmongers, am rating this book 5 stars and recommending it to people who think they need to diet. Push a pin in that idea until you've read this book.

If you want to be a leader and make a difference you need to be able to communicate, and be able to make a difference in the lives of people around you!

Two topics I loved in this book. Understanding how others think and how to change someone’s mind. I read smarter faster stronger by Charles Duhigg I have lived this concept. I allow you to make better decisions. Looking at the perception of others can give you a look at their perspective. You can go into the conversation and meet them where they are. This can allow you to lead them rather than try and get them to follow you.