Thanks to NetGalley and the author for granting me a copy of this book in exchange for an honest review.

This was so good but also :( ugh. Magdu.

This was not as a thrilling as I had hoped and I think the repetitive use of names in this book threw me off? Not sure why.

Uggggh. Well. Frustrated by this one, but did enjoy some parts.

This is about Finn and the aftermath of the death of her girlfriend in a climbing “accident.” You get some flashbacks between Finn and her girlfriend as well as Finn and her super toxic best friend, Daphne. There are secrets, tensions, drama, etc.

I guessed the way this ended early on but had dismissed the idea at the time as something that did not make sense. I don’t want to give it away by saying much more - but I found it very, very frustrating.

This book also does something I hate - repeatedly mentions some secret thing that happened and artificially withholds it as a later reveal even though the story is told in first person. In this case I don’t even know that it’s ever revealed? I feel like I missed an explanation for specifically what happened to Finn’s sister…

Other readers describe hating the toxic friendship - not me. I thought that was well-written, believable, uncomfortable, and distressing. It did exactly what it set out to do, and I thought it was a strong part of the book!

I sort of like what happened in the end in theory - I just wish it made more sense given the rest of the book. It didn’t end up working for me at all.

Thanks to NetGalley and the publisher for the ARC.

I really liked the premise of the book. Fin's girlfriend dies in a horrible accident, her best friend is clearly problematic, and Fin is just trying to come to terms with everything. Most of the book was done really well but some things irked me quite a bit.

Positives: The girl/girl relationship and all of the issues that can come with that when one of the families is not okay with it. Also the feelings of not feeling 'gay enough' until you've actually been with a woman as bi woman. I thought that was done really well. The twist caught me off guard. Love that I didn't see that coming. The narrator was perfection.

Negatives: The portrayal of the professionals in this book felt off. The way the police treated her, the way her therapist acted, it was odd. I hated Daphne's character so much. The entire book you could tell she was a problem and I got tired of hearing about her. These women are supposed to be 25 and 30 but the storyline feels very we're all 22.

I think there should be trigger warnings for this book. Narcism, sexual assault, suicide.

Overall I did really like the book, besides the small issues that I had with it. I consumed it one go.

I wanted to love this book, as the premise seemed right up my alley. It took too long to get to where it was going. I felt like there wasn’t enough suspense or build up when the truth was revealed. It just seemed like there was too much back and forth between past and present. I do think it was important for the storyline for some of the past reflections, but it was too much.

I will say, I was NOT expecting what had actually happened. I think it was a good twist. The twist redeemed the book a bit for me.

The narrator was great, I listened at 1.75x, and it was a good pace. She was easy to understand and had emotion in her narration.

I really wanted to enjoy this book, but it just didn’t work for me. The storyline had potential, but it was difficult to stay invested when none of the characters felt relatable or likable. Additionally, the portrayal of the “mean” cops seemed completely unbelievable. An officer wouldn't be that rude or dismissive to someone who has just lost their girlfriend; it felt unrealistic and out of place. Their behavior came across as a caricature rather than a genuine depiction, making the situation feel exaggerated and pulling me out of the story entirely.

Thank you Macmillan for the advance audio!

This book was cleverer by the end than I thought it was while I was reading it - though I’ll admit I had a bit of a tough time slotting all the “before” sections into place chronologically. The whole plot felt like a metaphor for Fin and Daphne’s friendship with Daphne overshadowing all and seeming to drag Fin along in her wake.

I would have loved more outdoors sections (climbing, hiking, etc) because it sounds like that’s a big part of Fin’s life but we really only see it in two scenes - instead spending much more time at her coffeeshop job (even if that was technically only one scene).

I also really loved Fin and Magdu’s relationship, as well as the realistic pressures from without (same sex marriage not being legal in Australia in 2017 when the book is set, grief after a sibling’s death by suicide, being undiagnosed dyslexic in a traditional school setting, having conservative parents who don’t approve of queer relationships, etc)

For such a short book, it was really solid