I learned a lot from the scientific studies perspective and I loved how the author had plenty to say about debunking certain mothering theories.

I will say it was a hair too long, I didn’t find it as interesting as I wanted it to be and overall found my mind drifting from time to time.

I was pleasantly surprised by how easily I immersed myself in this book. The author's experiences resonated with me, even though my motherhood journey differs slightly. It felt liberating to release some of the mom guilt we often carry.

What stood out was the author's candidness in sharing her story without sugarcoating the challenges. As I read her anecdotes, I reflected on my own similar experiences, reminding me of the complexities of being a mother.

I was also captivated by her exploration of the "mom myth" innovators—mainly men—who have shaped our understanding of motherhood. The author highlights a crucial truth: behind every male author of parenting books, there were remarkable women, and those stories were meant to be told.

Overall, this short yet insightful read illuminates not just one woman's story but also encourages all mothers to break free from societal myths and embrace their true identities. I’m grateful to NetGalley for the chance to read an early copy of this enlightening book.

I have been a mom for 2.5 years now, and I've spent a lot of it wondering whether I'm a "good mom." This book, part memoir and part treatise on what it really means to succeed as a mother, reinforces the underappreciated idea that most of mothering is NOT instinctual but learned over time. And that is a freeing thing to remember.

I related so much with Reddy's struggles as a new and working mom (Reddy also completed her doctoral degree while pregnant with her second child). It was helpful (and frustrating) to be reminded that the majority of expectations placed on mothers are deeply societal, set by men, and totally unrealistic. That it's normal and natural that sometimes only we as moms know what to do for our kids, but that we shouldn't be afraid to ask for help.

Great book. A great balance of research into the history of maternal/pediatric studies, as well as a vulnerable look into Reddy's own journey of motherhood. A helpful read for any mom. I enjoyed the audiobook narration; I believe I've heard this narrator before and she's excellent.

I did this book on audio and it was such a good pace and really perfect for listening. I really enjoyed how she infused her own story with the history of motherhood. It really added to the story by having it go back and forth.

The Good Mother Myth written by Nancy Reddy, blends elements of memoir, cultural criticism and history to provide context to the modern-day myth of the good mother. Reddy shares her own struggles of integrating her pre-motherhood expectations of being a “good” mother with her lived experience of new motherhood as the backdrop for an exploration of the researchers and physicians of the past and their influence to the modern discourse. The book moves back and forth between the history and Reddy’s experiences.

Reddy’s experiences of motherhood are relatable and therefore helpful vehicles for a reader to connect to. Her prose is lovely and her background as a poet shines in these sections.

A clear intention of the book is call into question the validity of the research and messaging that has cascaded through history from the research. Reddy highlights the clear bias, limited research "methods" used, and shaky generalizations that came from very limited research. While helpful to give to provide the background on this research, some of what was discussed didn't "debunk" but more explained the origin story of popular mythology. Reddy does an excellent job of piecing together the origin story but the criticism of some of the research was incomplete. To look back with modern eyes and modern expecations for how research should occur is a limited perspective. There is context that is missing. Much of the research across fields like psychiatry and medicine at the time (pre and post war world II) was riddled with bias, incomplete sampling methods and a lack of communication not just the research related to parents and children that is discussed in the book. There was also incredible disruption and loss of research and researchers from the war that delayed progress in many fields. Yes, the research is incomplete and shaky and it should be questioned but for a proper dissection, more context was needed as well as more of where it has gone since then. Researchers and clinicians from psychology, psychiatry and medicine have evaluated this work and attempted to fill some of the gaps from the original research. The research has not been blindly accepted and stagnant since it started. Now blind acceptance in popular culture? That does feel more accurate.

There are very powerful patterns that Reddy highlights that we should all pay attention to. How the media influenced the "story" of the research and how the social-political environment informed the questions asked in the research and eventually how they were answered. This is incredibly relevant today and we need to pay attention to it.

The narration in the audiobook is well done and feels suited to the text.

Reddy has produced a very relatable and validating book that is timely given this advice soaked time in parent culture.

In my first non-fiction ALC read of the year, Nancy Reddy had her first child, she found herself suddenly confronted with the ideal of a perfect mother. As a mother myself, I related to her thoughts about troubles in motherhood, feeling doubt, finding time to feel like yourself again AND being a “good” mother. I found her research and information on famous researchers interesting and it was really insightful to see how drastically the idea of a “good mother” varied and was widely studied by men who were not great examples in public, in marriages, or as fathers. Overall, I enjoyed this book and learned a lot about different ideas and thoughts on motherhood and raising children, and a special thanks to #NetGalley for the opportunity to listen to this book.

Any mother will agree that there is a lot of pressure on mothers. Mothers are expected to sacrifice themselves, based on specific theories of attachment, and outside childcare, while incredibly common, is often demonized.

In this book, Nancy Reddy goes through the history of a lot of parenting research in the twentieth century, and explores the science behind a lot of modern theories of attachment, showing that the theories that require the most sacrifice of the mother tend to be based on very shaky science, with little evidence to actually back them up. I feel like this book would be an excellent resource for a new mother.

I listened to the audiobook version. There was a single narrator, who was clear and engaging.

The Good Mother Myth is an interesting look at motherhood. It's both a memoir and critical look at the research that has shaped how we view mothering, for better or worse. As a mother, who taught psychology and had students endlessly fascinated by the Cloth Mother experiment, I found validation in my feelings about being a mom and how society has been conditioned to view me and I related so much to Reddy's personal experiences.

The narration was wonderful and added an additional layer of humanization.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for the advanced copy.

As an avid researcher of all things parenting, this book was enlightening! I found it so helpful in breaking the myth that I have to be everything to my child if I don't want him to be anxiously or avoidantly attached, therefore ruining his future. Nancy Reddy gives lots of wonderful research context to attachment theory and helps bolster the growing body of work that indicates community and the holistic health of the mother (contingent on a supportive community and partner) is how to have a healthy child. Thank you, Nancy Reddy, for your personal stories, too! They helped reframe some of my own struggles as a mom.

Really enjoyed the mix of memoir and social science/history. Reddy is refershingly honest about the challenges of new motherhood while also digging into the parenting "experts" from the early to mid-twentieth century - mostly males who had very little to do with their own children - who had tremendous influence over determining what women needed to do to be good mothers and how they should raise children.

Blending academia nonfiction and memoir, Nancy Reddy uses her own experiences to relay how society views motherhood and what we've gotten wrong along the way. My experience as a first time mom was met with a baby who cried a lot; allergic to egg through breastmilk, the nights before I figured out what was wrong were torture. Feeling like a failure was common and being overwhelmed moreso. Having my second and experiencing PPD, I came to realize that motherhood is a journey that many women travel but no one walks the same path. The Good Mother Myth is the type of book I wished I had.

Blending the history of baby rearing research and books, Nancy Reddy intelligently lays out a case that men can care for their infants no differently than their mothers; society just doesn't expect them to. I particularly liked her emphasis on how motherhood has been weaponized against women in the workforce by white men anytime women make headways; this is very relevant given the current state of the United States.

A relatively quick read, I finished the book in a day and really enjoyed my time with it. Insightful and will make you think, while also finding relatability to the struggles Nancy Reddy had as a mother herself.

Thank you Macmillan Audio for the gifted ALC.

What a great blend of memoir, history, science and social commentary. Reddy takes a closer look at the science and research that has permeated our culture and expectations of motherhood - spoiler alert: it’s mostly flawed & from the POV of white cis men. I could talk about this for hours and hours (and probably will).

Reddy’s own reflections on her early months of motherhood are relatable to all of us who’ve spent way too long googling and scrolling through social media parenting experts. What if we put the same energy we put into researching how to “do it right” into ourselves and each other?

Thank you to the publisher & NetGalley for an advanced copy of the audiobook in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own.

Overall, I think this is a great listen, especially for a newly postpartum mother. I don’t know that reading it BEFORE you’ve “been in it” would be beneficial, but I think reading it while you are in the thick of it, or while it’s fresh, would be worthwhile. Reddy makes many points I found myself nodding my head at and thinking “solidarity”. However, where this book falls short for me, was its organization. It needed a stronger editor because I found that it whipped between takedowns of early researchers, their work, and their personal lives, and then her own memoir. I think a stronger editor could have grouped this into a more coherent work because I felt like the memoir moments she was sharing didn’t always line up with her academic takedowns, so the shifts felt jarring rather than purposeful. That being said, I did find her takedowns of research we’ve held as “the norm” to be very powerful. I just wish the structure of the novel had been different.

Wow! Thank you Nancy Reddy! This is the book I didn’t even know I needed! As a mother of teens, it can be easy to forget the early years of motherhood and how challenging and often stressful they can be. Reddy takes us through the evolution of society’s standards of what makes a “good mother” and how those are based on often flawed and inadequate studies. It gently explains through personal and historical accounts how society is often too hard on moms who are trying to do what’s best for their kids while maintaining a sense of their own personal identities. It is encouraging and affirming for both new moms and mothers of older children! I highly recommend this audiobook!

Last year, when the Surgeon General released a warning on the state of parenting, I remember being rattled by this statistic: Mothers who work outside of the home today spend just as much if not more time on child rearing as stay-at-home moms of the 1970s.

“Intensive parenting” has been on the rise for several decades. And while all parents are feeling it– millennial dads have quadrupled the amount of time they spend with their kids!— the brunt of labor and expectations still falls on mom. In the modern age, it’s not just enough to keep your kids bathed, clean, and fed. We’re expected to expertly curate our children’s experiences, nurture their growing minds, and design our lives around them.

How did this happen? And where did these norms about mothering come from? Reddy re-visits the Harry Harlow primate studies and Dr. Spock’s best-selling books through a new, critical lens that problematizes them into pseudo science and myths.

Three things I especially loved about this book:

💛 This book is part sociology, part personal memoir. Reddy weaves in her own experiences in the newborn trenches to illustrate how these culturally embedded myths contribute to very real “mom guilt.”

💛 It’s practically required that any narrative nonfiction book about the human experience mentions the Harlow studies… but this was done in a way I’ve never seen done before!

💛 I did not know when I picked this up that Reddy lived in the same city that I live in and worked at the same place that I work at now! It was so delightful to listen along as she described raising her family in the same neighborhoods that I trek.

This is a mixture of memoir, social/cultural critique, and scientific research. I think this is a really important book with a fantastic message. I wanted a little less focus on personal anecdotes and historical context, and a little more focus on present-day discussions. But, overall, I really enjoyed what this book had to say and it was very thought-provoking. The narration was done really well and kept me engaged throughout.

First, I would like to thank Macmillan Audio, the author Nancy Reddy, and NetGalley for allowing me to preview this title before its publication date of January 21, 2025.

I had no idea what to expect going into this book so I was pleasantly surprised. The author explains the idea of "the good mother." This idea was formulated over a century ago and is still subscribed to even though it has been debunked over and over. The author weaves her own story of her journey into motherhood into the narrative of what is expected as a mother; how mothers are expected to do it all to have it all.

As an audiobook, the narration was wonderful and it did not feel as if I was being read to, but rather being spoken to.

I was highly recommend this book to any mother who has struggled to feel "good enough."

I read a lot of motherhood books, almost as validation for being a working mom, not because I have guilt, but because I like hearing the evolution of thoughts regarding parenting. Some of the “research” in this one was new to me and I always love hearing one’s experiences including differences between pregnancies/births/newborns in the same family.

I’m debating when I think the best time would be for an expectant “mother” to read this book and I truly cannot decide. Maybe in the early stages of planning, when your mind is still clear and you can have realistic conversations with your partner. Maybe best for the non birthing partner to read it first…

Really interesting take on the journey of modern motherhood. While not a mother yet, this felt very relatable. The author does a great job of bringing up issues that have been problematic for parents in the past and made them feel so normal. Shining a light on these topics allows parents to release the burden of thinking they are alone and empowers them to know others are facing the same issues.

Thank you to #netgalley and #nancyReddy for providing this ARC in exchange for my honest review.

I picked this one up for the social science side and ended up enjoying the memoir side even more! The Good Mother Myth is an excellent and obviously well-researched read that debunks the many myths prevalent in society about what it means to be a “good mother.” Nancy Reddy details her personal experiences in a completely raw, refreshingly honest and authentic manner, while simultaneously digging into the sloppy research and so-called “studies” (largely conducted by men) that have instilled society’s overbearing expectations of mothers.

I especially appreciated this read as a woman who wants to eventually have kids, but also has a strong desire for a career. It is so refreshing to not only hear someone saying “you can absolutely do both,” but also providing the science behind why women like myself (unfortunately) even question whether both is possible, and how to approach and shift this way of thinking. The Good Mother Myth is a great read for women and men alike and serves as an excellent first step in reframing how we as a society consider parenthood.

Thank you to Nancy Reddy, Macmillan Audio, & NetGalley for the ARC! All opinions are my own.