I started following Penny on Instagram a few years back. I've always considered myself to be someone slightly more comfortable with death. I'm that weird friend. So of course, I'm going to follow someone who tries to help educate others on the process of dying. I love her mission, and I think she does a good job making it a little less scary.

Penny narrates the book and I found her voice easy to listen to. The audiobook is a little under 6.5 hours, which I think is a decent length. Not too long, not too short. I enjoyed hearing the story of her childhood and how she got into social media.

If you want to see a behind the scenes of an "influencer" who also wants to change how we view death, I recommend reading Influencing Death by Penny Hawkins Smith. Thank you to NetGalley, Penny Hawkins Smith, and Dreamscape Media for the opportunity. I have written this review voluntarily and honestly.

Wow. I'm very intrigued by this topic, and so when I saw this audiobook, i was super excited.
I have to start by saying that my ADD definitely makes it a little harder to listen to audiobooks. I have a hard time being able to focus and take in the words being said typically; but the narration on this one was pretty good.

There were some slow moments as there are with most books, but overall, 8/10. Would read / listen to again!

What a wonderful, down-to-earth look at death and dying. This book does not flinch away from the taboo subject. Written with warmth and care, this book gave me all the feels. Penny faces death so unflinchingly, she allowed me to face my fears of death and process them with her open stories of the work she does and her life, in general.

nurse Penny is the hospice nurse I aspire to be, she’s knowledge, funny and has found that sweet spot to being exactly what the family (and patient) needs! I loved that she tells her story but in a way that flows cohesively with her hospice anecdotes. You will learn, you will love and you will get chills.

In comparison to The In-Between, Influencing Death (to me) embraces death in a different way, that most of us can digest. My husband just lost his grandfather on services and while I was able to help be his guide at times, I’m sure this book would’ve saved him so much confusion at the end. I’m recommending this to all my families on service!

This was a really great breakdown of what hospice is and what end of life care can look like. I highly recommend reading this and adding on Being Mortal by Atul Gawande.

I understand the author became known because of social media and that’s a big part of her life and likely the reason she was able to get this book published but the random inserts about social media and being and influencer just weren’t necessary. Discussing how her videos helped facilitate death discussions? Sure. That makes sense. Randomly defining what “unalive” means makes no sense.

There is a content warning at the beginning of the book which I love but this is what I noticed:
Domestic violence, toxic relationship, parental abandonment, drug abuse, alcohol abuse, death, medical content, drunk driving, bodily fluids (all of them)

My mother passed away when I was 14 years old. I was in the hospice room with her when she passed and it was one of the most surreal experiences I had had in my short life. I remember looking down at her and feeling like all of a sudden, she didn't look like her anymore. Now, as a 33 year old, I have experienced a similar feeling every time I have had to put a pet down. There's a certain absence to the body that can feel so unnerving and unnatural. They say that people look peaceful and just like they are sleeping, but I have never thought that. I have always thought they look empty and fake, like a wax replica.

After that experience with my mom, I developed death hyperfixation and anxiety as a result of undiagnosed OCD. It plagued me for years and then when I got married, I hyperfixated on my husband's death. It was all consuming and extremely distressing. I have been able to curb some of these fears with proper medication and psychiatric care. The fear was still there, however.

I saw this book on NetGalley and was approved to listen to an advanced copy. I jumped at the opportunity because of those prior experiences and it was honestly so cathartic for me. Hearing Penny's experiences in her own voice allowed me to think about the death of my loved ones and my own death in a more calm and logical way. Her matter of fact view combined with her empathetic and caring candor comforted me in a way I didn't expect. This is a really powerful account of Penny's journey that has certainly changed my life for the better. I highly recommend this book if you have death anxiety or are just curious about the hospice process from the viewpoint of a nurse.

Thank you Net Galley, Penny Hawkins Smith, and Dreamscape Media for access to this inspiring and comforting book.

Thank you to NetGalley, Dreamscape Media, and of course, Penny Hawkins Smith, RN for the advanced copy of Influencing Death.

Penny Hawkins Smith’s Influencing Death is a heartfelt, multifaceted exploration of life, death, and the spaces in between. Drawing on decades of experience as a hospice nurse and her own journey of recovery from addiction, Penny invites readers into a deeply personal and universal journey. The book is layered with poignant stories from her professional life, insights into her tumultuous past, and reflections on how embracing mortality can lead to a more fulfilling life.

I was particularly excited to read this book, having followed Penny on Instagram and already knowing some of her stories. Influencing Death felt like a natural progression, offering more depth and transparency than social media can provide. The book’s multilayered structure, however, may divide readers. While I appreciated how seamlessly Penny weaves her personal, professional, and educational narratives, it’s true that each layer could have stood alone as a separate book. Readers unfamiliar with Penny might find this structure a bit scattered, but for those of us who know her, the layers provide a fuller picture of her life and work.

The audiobook, narrated by Penny herself, is a highlight. Her warm, familiar voice carries the weight of her stories with authenticity and passion. Hearing her narrate adds an emotional resonance that might have been lost with another narrator. Through her voice, listeners can sense her vulnerability, strength, and dedication to demystifying death and living with purpose.

Influencing Death is a powerful and thought-provoking read that encourages readers to reflect on life’s ultimate inevitability. Those already familiar with Penny’s journey will find it deeply moving, while newcomers may gain valuable insights into the profound relationship between accepting death and living a meaningful life.

I really enjoyed the portions of this book that were related to Penny's incredibly important work as a hospice nurse. I am very interested in the conversation around normalizing death, since it really is a universal human experience. Her narrative is powerful and one that I think a lot of people should hear when experiencing the loss of a loved one to illness or old age. I found that the addition of her personal life's story from her childhood through her adulthood struggles with substance abuse felt like it did not blend well with the overall subject matter of the book. I would have preferred this book to be a bit more singularly focused on her experiences as a death worker.