A harrowing expose that unshutters the raw realities of an abusive marriage. This book makes it hurt and tells you why. It's an important piece of literature that uncovers the realities of those who are in abusive situations and how to heal from them.

6⭐️

[a copy of this book was provided to me by the publisher from netgalley. thank you!]

an absolutely stunning collection of autobiographical essays. i loved the geographical metaphors, & the way the author weaves her tales together was so beautiful. absolutely one to pick up

Raw, unflinching, and deeply moving, The Answer is in the Wound is a powerful collection of essays that lays bare the complexities of life after abuse. With searing honesty, Kelly Sundberg chronicles her attempt to rebuild a life for herself and her son after escaping an abusive marriage. Her writing is both lyrical and unrelenting, capturing the messy, nonlinear path of healing.

One line that lingered with me was: “Shame… shame is the void left by the stories I can’t tell.” It perfectly encapsulates the haunting silence that trauma often demands, and Sundberg’s willingness to speak the unspeakable is what makes this book so affecting.

While the subject matter is undeniably heavy, Sundberg’s prose carries a quiet strength. She does not romanticize suffering, nor does she offer easy answers. Instead, she reveals how trauma has the power to break us - and sometimes, remould us. Her reflections on motherhood, resilience, and the fractured but enduring hope of starting over are both heartbreaking and inspiring.

This is not a book I would recommend lightly, as it deals with sensitive and potentially triggering topics. However, for those willing to sit with its rawness, The Answer is in the Wound offers a profound meditation on survival, self-reclamation, and the complicated aftermath of escaping violence. It is a testament to the human spirit’s ability to endure - and to heal, however imperfectly.

I read this over the course of a few days, and whilst the entire book had me in tears, the ending really needing to hold them back.

Sundberg’s recount of her story is emotional and hard-hitting. It deeply goes into her feelings, memories and thoughts before, during and after her traumatic experience with domestic violence.

It’s uniquely done, with transcripts, email logs and letters- and her writing together with it all makes you feel her anger and fear. You feel how she felt, and you see the other side, that so many people never get to see.

Saying I love this book isn’t quite right. Because I will never love that people have these experiences to share. But I admire this book. I admire the courage, strength, anger and sheer force of will behind writing it.

As much as I would have liked to continue reading this the whole way through, I just read the part involving the kitten and I am very upset. I did not see any trigger warnings for animal cruelty in the beginning of the book. There should be one, I feel. Unfortunately, now I’m turned-off to the entire project and can’t continue to read it, for fear of what else she depicts.

It’s the kind of book you read and read. You don’t stop to think, reflect or do anything. You just feel and read. It’s devastating and triggering but also beautiful. Memories of abuse follow you everywhere and Sundberg offers a glimpse of transforming the rage into strength. A highly recommended book for those who want to understand post traumatic recovery. Thank you Netgalley for the e-ARC

Sundberg's engaging, thoughtful, and heartbreaking essays consider how the past continues to influence the author's present, sometimes in unexpected ways, as the legacy of trauma.

In her introduction she briefly chronicles her early life in a rural Mormon milieu, her escape to a term of university, and her youthful sense of adventure that led her to solitary work in the forest. She also notes that this sequence of lyric essays departs from her previous book, the account of an abusive marriage in her memoir Goodbye, Sweet Girl: A Story of Domestic Violence and Survival. Here, Sundberg is concerned not just with survival but with the complex aftermath of trauma, of how survivors live in the world when we have been profoundly damaged by it and when our capacity to trust has eroded.

The form of this set of essays is distinctive, even unique: Sundberg incorporates redacted found text to link sometimes brief snippets of memory and narrative. Often these are suggestive and elliptical rather than fully spelled out, inviting readers into the effort of co-constructing meaning.

There are startling images, poignant metaphors, and unusual turns of phrase. On one page the reader will be confronted with a stark statement: "One of the swans was murdered; he was stabbed in the night." And then the terse, elliptical language will open up into more lyrical and extended passages which meditate on abuse, sexuality, shame, and the female body.

A gorgeous, necessary book.

Beautiful concept and the author is a great story teller. The story wasn’t for me and that’s fine. I’m still so glad it exists! I especially loved the erased poetry. I know this will reach many people who need these words.

Have you ever heard the phrase "What doesn't kill you makes you stronger?"

Not so fast.

With "The Answer Is in the Wound," Kelly Sundberg has crafted a remarkably intimate, fiercely engaging, and beautifully lyrical essay collection focusing on the longer-lasting effects of trauma and PTSD on survivors.

As a survivor of sexual violence myself and with multiple traumatic experiences around disability, domestic violence, and suicide, I resonated immensely with Sundberg's revealing and challenging collection that challenges a culture in which violence against women, and in my case those with disabilities, is normalized. Sundberg weaves her words in such a way that she illuminates the complex, nonlinear nature of recovery and refuses to make it more palatable - because it's not - and reveals that what doesn't kill you actually stays with you in ways good and bad and redefining your very existence.

Does it mean that one can't heal? Of course not. Does it mean that there aren't areas where you may, in fact, end up stronger? Of course not. Sundberg's powerful revelations, however, serve as a vivid reminder that over-simplifying trauma recovery is a danger and that trauma often does linger in ways big and small in our daily lives and as we learn how to experience life, intimacy, relationships, parenting, and a myriad of other experiences without trauma but ever-present memories of it.

"The Answer Is in the Wound" isn't simply a memoir nor is it simply Sundberg's own testimony. Sundberg creates a tapestry of testimony alongside trauma research to craft a poignant yet fact-based redemptive arc for the trauma survivor. Sundberg paints us a portrait of a redemptive arc that embraces the new reality of who we are post-trauma, an approach that resonates deeply with me and is likely at least part of the reason for my own ability to survive and thrive post-trauma.

At times, "The Answer Is in the Wound" feels like a loud reclamation of self - such as when Sundberg creates erasure poetry created from her abusive ex-husband's apologetic emails.

Remarkable. Simply remarkable.

Sundberg shares ideas and research from familiar names like Judith Herman, Bessel van der Kolk, and Peter Levine to not just drive home research but to also affirm so much of what she writes so beautifully here.

"The Answer Is in the Wound" isn't always an easy read. It's not intended to be an easy read. It's beautiful. It's powerful. It's raw. It's victorious.

For those who've experienced trauma, especially of a more interpersonal nature, "The Answer Is in the Wound" is a book that deserves to be in one's library of hope.

The Answer Is In The Wound by Kelly Sundberg, is a very personal, tender collection of autobiographical essays, that fit together in a practically seamless manner.

Describing her marriage to an abusive husband, and the far reaching and long term consequences of this trauma, and the extensive and arduous healing process, Sundberg touches on the stigma associated with this type of violence.

Profound quotes from some of my favourite authors are effectively spread throughout the book, enhancing the understanding of Sundberg's thoughts, influences and writing.

Themes of feminism, motherhood, resilience, healing, grief, love, and sacrifice all come together in this incredible book.

Expected Publication Date: August 26, 2025

Many thanks to NetGalley, Kelly Sundberg, and Grove Atlantic for access to an eARC. All opinions are my own.