A cute and fun murder mystery (Can a murder be fun? Only in light and cozy mysteries!). It takes place during the days leading up to and the weekend of an annual beauty pageant. Dakota’s mother died 11 months ago, leaving her the farmhouse in debt, huge unpaid medical bills, and monthly letters, the most recent of which included a copy of a submitted entry form in Dakota’s name for the pageant - emceed by her aunt. Dakota enters the world of the pageant unwillingly, hoping to earn the money to save her and her aunt from bankruptcy. This southern cowgirl has been more at home with horses than people, but Dakota learns a lot about herself as she bonds with some of the pageant contestants and learns their motivations. Much of the humor comes from the ridiculous pageant situations as seen through Dakota’s eyes and the malapropisms spewed by one of Dakota’s elementary school friends, in from NYC, who turns out to be the daughter of the elderly pageant owner, Mr Finch. Finch and his wife also own the mansion where the annual event is held. And then… someone dies.
While parts of the mystery seemed obvious to me, I did not have all the answers and I enjoyed the reveal. The audiobook is well narrated with a bright southern accent that (thankfully) is not too heavy (but definitely heavier at some times than others). It’s a great way to spend some time enjoying a behind-the-scenes view of a pageant and to contemplate the strong bonds of familial love.
My thanks to the author, publisher, producer, and #NetGalley for early access to the audiobook of #ABeautyQueensGuidetoMurderandMayhem for review purposes. Publication date: 28 Feb 2025.

A Beauty Queen's Guide to Murder and Mayhem had such potential. Was there murder? Yes. Was there mayhem? No. None at all. Dakota is a small-town girl, an orphan with only her aunt to rely on. There was potential here from zero to Beauty Queen but the plot was so predictable. I'm not sure how I made it through this one. I listened on audio and the narrator was horrendous. The voices she used to for the aunt and the men was so hard to listen too. Maybe you'll have more fun with this one as a physical or ebook. Honestly, there are so many better books out there that this one can be a hard pass.

This just wasn’t a hit for me. The narrator was great, and the cover and description were promising, but it just never won me over.

Thank you to NetGalley for the advance reader copy in exchange for my honest review.

A Beauty Queen’s Guide to Murder and Mayhem by Kristen Bird

Audiobook Review

Dakota Green would rather muck out stables than strut across a pageant stage, but her late mum’s final wish has her trading boots for ballgowns. With her family home on the line, Dakota begrudgingly enters Aubergine’s annual beauty pageant, only to stumble into a decades-old mystery of a missing beauty queen. When the current pageant owner disappears and suspicion falls on her Aunt DeeDee, Dakota finds herself navigating catty contestants, skeptical judges, and a maddeningly handsome sheriff—all while trying not to trip in her heels.

This audiobook was an absolute delight. The mix of humour, mystery, and small-town secrets made for an engaging listen, and the narration was top-tier. The voices were distinct, the accents added charm, and there were no awkward re-recordings to pull me out of the story. The letters from Dakota’s mum added a heartfelt touch, and that final twist? Did not see it coming.

Verdict: A sharp, witty mystery with plenty of charm, perfect for audiobook lovers.

Thank you NetGalley & Storm Publishing for this advance audio copy! ✨

A Beauty Queen’s Guide to Murder and Mayhem was a fun quick listen that anyone who likes Miss Congeniality or Clue would likely find worth the read.

I enjoyed our FMC, Dakota, who was pushed into her towns annual beauty pageant at the request of her deceased mother (despite despising everything that comes with pageants) just so she could have a shot at the winnings to pay off her debt and keep the home she’s living in. As the debt collectors are calling and she’s faced with a foreclosure notice Dakota knows this is her only chance.

As soon as she arrives we’re introduced to many characters with that southern charm (and judgements) and I’m right there with Dakota’s original thoughts about all the pageantry. Soon after the introductions we’re met with the big question of what happened to the mysterious disappearance of the 2001 pageant winner and a current murder of the pageant creator.

The rest of the book is full of forged female friendships as we see more of what’s behind some of these contestants and the big question of who Miss 2001 was & who the killer is.

It was intriguing enough to keep me listening, but did lose me during the last half of the book. I wish there would’ve been a little more to Sheriff Charlie Strong, he didn’t add anything memorable for me and the interactions between Strong and Dakota didn’t give me the chemistry I felt the author was trying to portray. The ending twist was a little predictable, but thankfully did have a surprising element.

If you’re looking for a cozy little mystery read, definitely pick this one up!

Thank you #NetGalley for the honor of receiving this ARC!!
This one wasn't for me. I felt like I was being held captive by someone that will not stop talking, even though I keep trying to walk away.
The story is cute, just way too wordy and drawn out. Maybe if it was half (or less) the length, it would have been more enjoyable.

If you're looking for a light-hearted, fun, who-done-it thriller, add this to your TBR. This cute story tests the boundaries of loyalty and friendship while uncovering decades old secrets to solve a beauty queen's disappearance. We quickly find out there's much more to the story, and those details lead to a murder.

Thank you, NetGalley and Dreamscape Select | Storm Publishing for this ARC audiobook for review. This was a super fun cozy as Dakota Green is still grieving the loss of her mother and must enter the world of southern beauty pageants in her hometown in hopes to win money to save her family home and possibly finish her veterinary degree. But Dakota may be a beauty, pageants are a world of their own, especially when the pageant owner mysteriously vanishes and Dakota’s aunt is main suspect. Dakota must compete without the help of her aunt while trying to figure out what’s really going on. This was a fun and fast teas and the first book in a new series. I look forward to move adventures with Dakota.

This was a cozy palate cleanser of a book that hit at the right time.

I am thankful to have gotten the ALC for free from Dreamscape Select through NetGalley to read which gave me the opportunity to voluntarily leave a review.

I will say that while I enjoyed the narrator Katie Beuderts natural speaking voice for the female main character, I did not enjoy the choices she made for the other chargers. She turned them into cheesy caricatures which took me out of the story many times along the way. Had this in anyway been a comedic novel, maybe it could have gotten away with it but it’s a mystery. It just doesn’t work.

The author is compared to powerhouse thriller authors of Liane Moriarty, Mary Kubica, Lucy Foley, Ruth Ware, and Adele Parks as per her website and because of the narration I felt this couldn’t be further from reality. That being said, had I read the physical book I may have been able to make the connection. All that to say that a narration can completely change the impact of a book.

However, I enjoyed the story. I took it in a very cozy, fluffy way due to the narration despite it starting with the death of a parent and a daughter plagued with significant debt and grief. I enjoyed going along the ride of Dakota (FMC) as she navigates the Beauty Pageant world along with playing amateur sleuths she tries to solve a murder during the pageant.

I think cozy detective reader will love and embrace this story. It’s perfect to cuddle up on a wintery or rainy weekend.
It comes out on February 28th 2025 from Storm Publishing.

My rating system since GoodReads doesn’t have partial stars and I rarely round up.

⭐️ Hated it
⭐️⭐️ Had a lot of trouble, prose issues, really not my cup of tea (potentially DNF’d or thought about it)
⭐️⭐️⭐️ Meh, it was an ok read but nothing special
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Really enjoyed it! Would recommend to others
⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️⭐️ Outstanding! Will circle back and read again

Dakota is trying to keep her mother‘s memory alive by following a month-to-month list of things that she wanted her daughter to accomplish. This month Dakota has to enter a beauty pageant. Not something she would normally do, Dakota signs up for the contest to honor her mother and hopefully infuse her bank account with some much-needed cash. There are murders and some things are stolen and Dakota‘s aunt is the police’s prime suspect. So now she’ll have to take off her crown and put on her detective hat in order to save her aunt and maybe even herself.

A Beauty Queen's Guide to Murder and Mayhem was a cozy mystery, with a beauty pageant and some amateur sleuthing thrown in. I really enjoyed the characters in this story. Dakota was very witty and down to earth, and I liked that about her. The chemistry between Dakota and the sheriff worked really well.
I listened to this on audio, and the narrators did a great job!
Thank you to Storm Publishing for providing this book for review consideration via NetGalley. All opinions are my own.

A huge thank you to the publisher and to Netgalley for providing this book for me to listen to and review! I absolutely adored this novel, even though it started off a bit slow. The cast of characters is epic and hilarious, and I am obsessed with Aubergine, Virginia as a location and a character of its own. Bird allows the reader into this world of pageants and strong women, while taking us on a wild ride of a mystery as a bonus. Sevilla’s weird malaprops made me belly laugh every single time, and even though I knew they were coming, they were all so clever that I couldn’t help it. The narrator was perfect, and she brought such a homey quality to Dakota that you can’t help but love her. The mystery itself was satisfying and smart, adding what I consider to be a very necessary addition to any cozy mystery: a weirdly specific hobby that is essential to the crime! A triumph of the genre! It was incredible that the author was able to floor me all the way to the last minute of the epilogue!

Driven by grief from losing her mother, Dakota is following her mother's month 11 letter. This time the letter asks her to compete is a beauty pageant, in her hometown, which carries a significant price money. Dakota reluctantly agrees, beauty pageants are not her thing, but she needs the money. Except there are murders and thefts and her aunt is framed. While competing, Dakota must use her smarts to find out what really happened.

This book was a bit slow as far as the investigation went, but somewhere in the 70% mark just picked up. It was fun to listen to, and I loved all the side characters who support the FMC. The love interest is in a very nascent stage, so more to come on that. An the final month 12 letter was a surprise!!

#netgalley #ABeautyQueensGuidetoMurderandMayhem

This was a quirky, fun time. The title pretty much sums up the premise of the book. With its cast of characters unfolding the mystery of the beauty pageant.

This was a fun read that felt cosy and light so definitely a good palette cleanser between darker thrillers.

The plot did feel pretty basic and all the twists and turns did feel a tad basic but it was still an enjoyable listen!

The characters were nice and the narrator did a great job with all the characters and really added the fun element!

Overall a decent cosy mystery that did a great job of being light and cheery but won't necessarily be one I'll think about much after finishing!

Dakota Green is happy working with horses and not false eyelashes and contestant evening gowns like her mother. After she lost her mother, her beloved Aunt Dee Dee raised her and insists the only way to raise the money she needs is to win the Rose Palace Beauty Contest. She very reluctantly decides to enter the contest. She is in a totally foreign world to her but with her aunt by her side, she feels ready to try. Until....she is arrested when the pageant owner vanishes. Dakota is happier as an investigator than a beauty pageant contestant, but has to do both.

A mystery told with delightful Southern humor. My first Kristen Bird book I read, I Love it When You Lie, was such a treat - an interesting story told with Southern humor; this book was another treat!

The narrator was the perfect voice for this book! As soon as I started the audiobook, I knew her voice was perfect as the narrator!

My thanks to Net Galley, and Storm Publishing for advanced copies of the e-book and audiobook. And a special thanks to author Kristen Bird for a signed copy of her book!

I couldn’t get into this; I was expecting something fun and campy… something that made me smile and laugh and that wasn’t Happening. I also don’t care for southern accents and that might have been the problem… sorry! The cover is fantastic.