Clementine Crane is frustrated and really fed up. Like so many women, she juggles her daily life with a husband, three children, job and the thousands of tasks she faces every day. She has finally found a best friend in 87 year old Georgia. What shocks Clementine is the onset of perimenopause, particularly hot flashes. She simply cannot handle much more so she sets out to take control and enable all women who are enduring this phase of life. Clementine believes women are not adequately prepared or supported so she becomes a Tik Tok sensation with her “I prefer not to” theme. Much of this book revolves around hot flash symptoms and gynecologists. Her family thinks she is crazy when she disrobes in public and starts refusing all their requests for driving and picking up take-out. It was difficult to connect with much of Clementine’s behavior including her antics at work. This book will not be for everyone. Still the theme is understandable and often relatable, and the texts by her children hilarious. With thanks to Netgalley and Alcove Press for this ARC. My opinions are my own.

This was a fun one, quirky and funny. It fostered pensiveness and I liked the tenacity of the main character. Refreshing for women and women readers everywhere.

I just finished reading this book. The plot was absolutely fantastic! It was quite the page turner, and I could nor put the book down once I began reading it. I cannot wait for it to be released. I will recommend it to everyone I know!

“I prefer not to.” A simple phrase… and Clementine’s brilliantly bold rebellion.

Clementine Crane Prefers Not To is a hilariously honest, refreshingly raw exploration of modern womanhood, told through the voice of a main character who feels like all of us. Clementine isn’t just quirky and overwhelmed—she’s the glue, the lynchpin, the calendar-wielding, errand-running, appointment-booking, family-organising everything-doer. And when she hits her limit (and her first hot flash), it all starts to unravel—in the most gloriously relatable way.

This book had me laughing, nodding, and occasionally yelling, “YES!” at the page. Kristin Bair doesn’t shy away from the emotional toll of invisible labour or the identity earthquake that perimenopause can bring. It’s brutally honest, but also deeply compassionate, and packed with laugh-out-loud moments that make the heavier truths hit even harder.

Clementine’s journey felt like both a breakdown and a breakthrough—and it was such a joy to follow her as she set boundaries, let go of the guilt, and slowly reclaimed herself. The pacing is quick, the tone is spot-on, and the story is exactly the kind of cathartic, empowering read that so many women need.

If you’ve ever felt like the world might fall apart if you stop holding it together—this one’s for you. Honest, hilarious, and long overdue.

This book exceeded my expectations. The author was not afraid to put it all out there and say it all out loud.
It was the ultimate fantasy read for a perimenopausal woman, like me. We whisper to each other about what it would be like to take off for some coveted alone time and just not have to manage everyone else's lives for a while.
I was especially touched by Bair's description of a frazzled wife/mother endlessly stuffing her chest cavity full of all the appointments for everyone in the family, activities, destinations, locations of household items, planning lists for holidays, EVERYTHING. After 40 some years, it takes its toll. And as that mental load starts to hit peek capacity, perimenopause comes along to rip everything you thought you knew about your own body away. It's a unique and dramatic time that is only starting to come into the light.
Clementine Crane is a hero for modern perimenopausal women. I loved that she was quirky, and angry, and exhausted from doing it all for so long.
It's perfectly written and I often found myself laughing out loud or nodding fiercely with the spot on depictions of what it's like.
The decremental extinguishing of a woman's spirit. Amen, sister!
Can't wait to read more by this author.

Clemetine Crane has a demanding husband, demanding kids, and a difficult boss. She finds herself constantly juggling to keep all of the balls in the air- until one day she cannot any longer. As she enters peri-menopause and finds out that there is little in the way of knowledge and support out there, she finds herself championing the cause, picking up friends and supporters along the way, even though her family thinks that she has officially lost it.

My only complaint about this book? It isn't out until October 2025. This was- by far- the most relatable book that I have read in a very long time. As a 43-year-old with a uterus and demanding kids and a demanding job, I found myself nodding along with Clementine's declarations throughout the book. As the mother of kids who frequently need things- RIGHT NOW- I found the text scenes particularly relatable and also hilarious!

I really realized how much of an impact this book had on me when I found myself thinking and saying "I would prefer not to". Kristin Blair has written a hit here. This is easily my favourite book of 2025 to date and I can't wait until every mother, woman, wife, and uterus- haver can read this too.

Clementine Crane Prefers Not To by Kristin Bair is a clever and empowering tale about a woman who boldly chooses to reject societal expectations and discovers her own strength in the process. With humor and sharp insight, the book dives into themes of individuality and resilience, making it both entertaining and thought-provoking.

This was an absolute joy to read, as a person new to raging 'hotness' this funny and yet moving story is an ode to all women who have. just. had. enough. Fantastic plot and character development with lots of depth behind the humour, this was a real joy to read.

Oh my gosh!!!! If you are a woman going through (peri) menopause this book is for you! A subject that is taboo, even today, but Kristin Bair brings it to us with laughter and tears. The main character, Clementine Crane, takes you through her first hot flash and all the things that come along with (peri) menopause! I loved Clementine and how she learned to take time for herself by the simple phrase " I prefer not to" and how she finds new beginnings for her life.

Clementine had 4 kids, one of them being her brain dead husband who shares zero mental load because that’s the woman’s job. She’s had enough and starts a viral ‘I’d rather not’ movement that involves her going off the rails a few times. A fun, easy book overall and relatable especially for moms, but also a bit excessive with characters that were mid level likable at best.

As a woman of a certain age I was absolutely looking forward to reading this book. I wanted to love it. I tried to love it. But the characters, especially Clementine, were just so over the top I couldn’t take any of them seriously. People just don’t behave like this. Boy glad or no, women aren’t stripping off their clothes and diving into a 3 foot snowbank or stealing goldfish from a library fish tank. It felt like the author was trying too hard to be relatable and funny and the book wasn’t either for me.

Every woman should read this book because Clementine and various situations are so relatable. I enjoyed this lighthearted and incredibly funny read.

An excellent read for any and all readers! Author comes at you with both barrels and knocks you out of your shoes! Great job fleshing out all the characters. I give this book FIVE stars! Definitely recommend!

Fans of Laurie Gelman, buckle up for a hilarious depiction of life in what I hate to call middle age. This book takes the reader on a wild ride as we follow Clementine through her shocking first experience with hot flashes and the extremely problematic way her gynecologist brushes off her concerns and even blames her for the severity of her symptoms.

While I don’t agree with anyone casually choosing to “opt out” of their responsibilities, no matter how unfairly weighted the responsibilities have been throughout her marriage, I did love seeing Clementine learn to stand up for herself and what she wanted. Does she take things a bit far at times? Absolutely! (That’s part of the fun of fiction; let’s be honest!)

I appreciated the references to Ibsen’s play “A Doll’s House” and I absolutely must go read the story “Bartleby the Scrivener” now that I have this novel to frame it in a new way. There are some other fun moments such as the little text game Clementine’s fellow library staffers play in which they must name the author and title of a book that fits a given category like “books with food in the title.”

Clementine is a relatable heroine standing up for “people with uteruses,” as she says in her TikToks. This book brings to light some crucial issues, in a fun and madcap way. The mental (and physical) load so many women carry for their families, in this often unspoken arrangement, can be incredibly daunting, and the lack of information for women experiencing perimenopause is pretty shocking, too. This book can be entertaining while empowering women to think about their lives and make the best choices for themselves.

Many thanks to NetGalley and Alcove Press for the chance to read an ARC of this novel!

There were things I really liked about this but there were also things that I didn’t. I’ll lead with - I think this is a really good read with a great message that every woman should read. It’s relatable. It’s funny. It’s sad. I loved the relatability element to it. What I didn’t like was how often some phrases were used throughout the book. (That’s one of my personal nitpicks. I hate when things get repetitive in books and unfortunately this one falls into that category). Repeating something a handful of times I can look past but this one, it was in double digits and that just irks me. BUT overall, I really did like this.

I loved this book! I think all women should read it. It was funny, sad, poignant and hit the nail right on the head. Clementine is my hero! The characters were so well written I thought I was hearing from a friend instead of reading a story. I look forward to reading more from Kristin Bair!

This is the book I needed. My friends need. Every women in our age-cohort needs. Clem is a mother of three who carries the mental load for her entire family and is starting to feel like Atlas...she's ready to shrug. How many people in this stage of life can relate? But then, she does something we've all wanted to do....she stops. She says no. She focuses on herself. It's a difficult journey, but she finds herself...and it. is. beautiful.

Clementine Crane Prefers Not To
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❝ I am talking about the decremental extinction of a woman’s spirit, my dear child. It’s what happens to women over time … women with kids and needy husbands and bosses who don’t listen and periods and hot flashes and lost dreams and sycamore trees. ❞


⟢ Where do I start? We follow Clementine Crane, a mother of three (four if you count her husband) who is often taken for granted by everyone around her. If her husband can't find his sweater, he asks Clementine. If her daughter forgets her skates at school, she asks Clementine for help. If her son needs money deposited into his account because he’s always hungry, he turns to Clementine. However, after experiencing a series of hot flashes from perimenopause and sleepless nights due to her husband's loud snoring, she is pushed to her limit and finally decides to stand up for herself and prefers not to.

the summary said that Clementine wanted to one small refusal at a time… but i beg to differ because this woman dropped EVERYTHING.

lose a sweater? make them look for it. forget something at home? sucks for you. however, important matters like going to appointments and feeding your children should never be taken lightly or treated as optional decisions.

there is promise in the story, and i can definitely relate as a person outside because my mother suffers from daily hot flashes, which she talks about VERY openly. and that's what i think was the key issue in Clementine's case, the lack of communication. while she does attempt to address her situation to the household, when it gets brushed off, she chooses to let it go.

another significant moment was when Clementine unintentionally started an "I prefer not to" movement that became a viral TikTok sensation as this related to the women who want to be seen, heard, felt underappreciated, and they call themselves “hot-flashers” because that’s what they’re experiencing—hot flashes.

since this is a character-driven story, i struggled to connect with Clementine because of some erratic choices she makes, like stealing the school’s goldfish, to which she seems oddly attached. there’s also a scene where she sneaks into her ob-gyn’s office as part of one of her “I prefer not to” missions and recruits other women experiencing hot flashes because she disagrees with the doctor’s prognosis. when she introduced herself as “Clementine Crane, Connector of People to Magical Things,” I WAS SO EMBARRASSED. while i understand that these women are trying to express their newfound confidence, i don’t think that was the right approach.

moreover, what threw me off around the 20-30% mark was that she repeatedly refers to herself as the Connector of People to Magical Things on numerous occasions.

“I’m the Connector of People to Magical Things,” she says this twenty-four times—I looked it up. No wonder I make this face every time she introduces herself! 🫤

no matter what, everyone should definitely take a chance on this. even if i can't connect directly, there's a spark of possibility that a hot-flasher reading this might relate with excitement :) trying to connect with someone who may not fully understand your experience is like tuning into a radio station with a weak signal. even if the reception isn't crystal clear, there's still the possibility of picking up some valuable insights or making meaningful connections if you persist and adjust your approach.

Thank you to NetGalley, Alcove Press, and the talented, Kristin Bair for providing an advance copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. Please remember that this opinion is my own. The book will be published in October 2025 .ᐟ

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Kristin Bair nails the chaos of modern womanhood with wit as sharp as Clementine’s breaking point. From family meltdowns to viral fame, her journey is a rollercoaster of midlife mayhem, unexpected empowerment, and moments that will have you laughing and nodding in recognition. If you’ve ever juggled too much and wondered when is it my turn?, this one’s for you.

Lighthearted, funny, and truly nonlinear escape from the humdrum, every day, where everyone wants something and never shows appreciation - taken for granted - but those hot flashes push you over that edge to change things up. And maybe fishnap the library mascot, amongst other previously out-of-character actions. Fun and a great mental escape!