Not If I See You First by Eric Lindstrom hit me harder than I expected. Parker Grant isn’t just a character; she’s someone you can’t help but root for. Her sharp humor and fierce independence make her feel real, like someone you might know—or even parts of yourself. What really stuck with me is how Lindstrom captures her journey through grief, trust, and figuring out who she is, all while navigating life without sight. The way Parker handles her challenges, with sarcasm and grit, reminded me of how we all put up walls to protect ourselves. But what resonated most was her vulnerability, which sneaks through in unexpected ways. This isn’t just a story about blindness—it’s about the courage it takes to let people in and see things for what they truly are.

I received this free eARC novel from NetGalley. This is my honest review.

This has been on my TBR pile for so long, and I'm glad I finally got around to it. I really enjoyed the storyline and seeing the characters change throughout the story was a great character development. The plot was great and kept my attention. I'm glad I got the chance to read this and will be on the lookout for more in the future!

Unfortunately this book has gone in my DNF pile. It just wasn't engaging me like it would have years ago when I first requested it. My reading tastes have changed a lot over the years as I've gotten older and unfortunately some of the books requested years ago have been affected by my reading tastes and the fact that a lot of books for younger audiences haven't been grasping my attention as of late. I thank you for the opportunity to read and review this book.

Parker is blind. But she hasn't always been. Parker was in a car accident that caused her to lose her vision. She is okay with the way her life is. She does her daily runs. Scott, her ex boyfriend, who she hasn't spoken to for years keeps showing up in her life recently.
I don't know what it's like to be blind, but I hope that I can be like Parker. Independent and am to still live your life. I admire that! Parker is now one of my book heroes.

My interests have changed since being sent this book. At this time I won't be reading or reviewing this title. Thank you.

The main character was a very lovable snarky girl. I loved seeing her navigate her disability and how she didn't let it stop her from anything. The resilience was inspiring, but it wasn't overly inspirational or mushy. I was rooting for Parker from page one.
I liked the focus on the familial aspect, and I enjoyed getting to know Parker's dysfunctional family. I also loved Sarah and her friendship with Parker.
Overall I was pleased with the book and I love seeing different disabilities represented!

Now, let me explain the only 3 stars for my review.

This book was well written, the characters were real, the time and place were drawn well and, though I am not blind so I am not sure how someone who does not see would feel, I think the MC being blind and how she dealt with it was realistically done.

The part that made this only three stars and toss the book down about a third of the way in? The teenage drama. Blind teens have the same drama as those with sight. They aren't any different from anyone else. And that is shown in this book. I really do not do drama and since this book had a goodly amount of it, it just didn't work for me. But I'm not the target demographic with this book.

I think YA readers who enjoy contemporary settings and high school drama will really enjoy this book. Drama is not for me, but that's just me. The rest of this book is solid in building the characters in your mind, getting to understand a little of what a blind person goes through each day and the setting is realistic. So no, not a bad book, just not quite the right fit for me.

I definitely recommend this book if you are looking for a protagonist who has a disability and is living a regular life, including high school drama. 3 stars, but if this was my type of book, four to four and a half I think.

My thanks to NetGalley and Little, Brown Books for Young Readers Poppy for an eARC copy of this book to read and review.

This one was very well-written. I enjoyed it. The main character's personality could be annoying at times, but it gets explained at least.

Not If I See You First was both delightful and sad. Very real, and with a dash of drama thanks to Parker and the way she thought about herself first - like many other teenagers tend to do.

I'm not sure why I kept Not If I See You First for so long on my kindle without reading it - it was as if it was hiding in plain sight! Parker was a very prickly heroine, and some might not enjoy her at all. I found her to be refreshing in some ways, though, because not only was she brutally honest, she was able to deal with the aftermath of her honesty as well. Her life was not an easy one, and I guess that is partly why I was indulgent with her. Also, I think a lot of teens are quite self absorbed and somewhat unable to put themselves in someone else's situation. This is especially true for Parker, as her own situation was so complex it was impossible for her to imagine that other people had their own pains and their own drama.

It's not the first time I read a young adult story with a blind heroine, but I think Not If I See You First made a greater impression on me for several reasons. Parker did her very best to be independent and follow her own dreams. From running in the morning to navigating school mostly on her own. And I found the fact that she was able to ask for help when she really needed it good, too - even if she could be abrupt to the point of impolite when shutting people down when she didn't need their help.

Not If I See You First is a multilayered story, it deals with Parker's disability. And it also deals with grief. And it definitely deals with trust and forgiveness, too. Parker's prickliness could even be a good thing, because her abrasive personality shows that not everybody has to be people pleasers, as she still had friends who stood by her. And those friends were more numerous than she had anticipated when she really needed them. Thus dealing with several important moments in Parker's life, and seeing her coming to the realisation that her friends and acquaintances have feelings too was something I really enjoyed!

Written in first person point of view, from Parker's perspective, and in present tense, I really discovered things alongside Parker. This made me sometimes come to the same conclusions as her, even if I have more experience and should have been able to see things from a different angle. I guess I got so immersed in her I wasn't able to take that step back and be more analytical, and that's a good point in Not If I See You First's favor.