It is so important to try different tactics as all kids are different. For me this book was a great level set on how important language and how it is used especially when speaking with children. They are still learning the meanings of words and can easily get lost by a word they didn't understand.

Great idea for a book and really well executed. A thoroughly good read. Highly recommended. .

This book provides many alternatives to yelling at your kids that offer more opportunity for cooperation and improving your relationship with your child. The amount of alternatives can be overwhelming, so the authors provide some outlines and cheat sheets at the end of each chapter. The book is also aided by the stories of parents using these tools. Not every tool will work in every situation, and the authors are very real about the limits of these tools, but usually, you can find something that works. Mostly, it helps to have some idea of what to do that is constructive instead of just defaulting to yelling because we don't know what to do. Practicing these tools will help you use them, and the authors give a lot of grace for those times when we can't remember or nothing works. The last part of the book deals with specific issues which is also helpful. I'm glad I read it, and I have one of the cheat sheets on my refrigerator.

Very good ideas and concept. I recommend everyone to read this book that has any kids of their own.

During my undergrad, I worked at my university's child development center with young children, where we practiced many of the strategies laid out in this book. I'd had no idea where they came from until I got this book- the advice is brilliant! I know from experience with many children that the strategies work, and I was grateful for the refresher and some new ideas as I have a two-and-a-half year old now. I work with parents of young children and will recommend this highly!

Joanna Faber grew up in her mother's shadow. After all, her mom was one of the authors of How to Talk So Kids Will Listen and Listen So Kids Will Talk. When Joanna found she was still having trouble with her small children, she teamed up with her friend Julie King to write a guide that built on her mother's research but focused on toddlers and preschoolers. These moms draw on their own experiences, an understanding of psychology, and the stories of hundreds of parents to create a book that is indispensable for moms and dads.

How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen works as both a general guide and instructions for very specific circumstances. The authors provide parents with a set of ideas that they refer to as the parenting toolbox, like acknowledging feelings, making things fun, giving a choice, or problem-solving with your child. These tools are then shown in application at bedtime, when your child lies, and during the madness that is trying to get out the door in the morning. This is a book that I will be referring to often, as I navigate life with my little girl.

How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen:
A Survival Guide to Life with Children Ages 2-7
By Joanna Faber and Julie King
Scribner January 2017
Read via Netgalley

A very practical handbook on how to deal with the big emotions of little children from the vantage point of experts on child psychology and behavior. What I especially appreciated about this book was the concrete examples of how to manage specific (yet very common speaking as a parent of two little ones) situations. The book gives you the language to deal with children on their terms, not yours. It made me rethink how I discipline and work with my children on a daily basis. Thank you for the copy! I appreciated it, and learned a lot from it.

This review originally ran on Brightly:

In the vast world of parenting books, there are a few that stand the test of time. One of these books, How to Talk So Kids Will Listen & Listen So Kids Will Talk by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish, began popping up in my life around the time my twins were two years old — it was (and continues to be) referenced in many other parenting books I read and it was recommended by fellow parents with older children. At that time, though, I found that, while the advice seemed great, a lot of it just wasn’t possible to use with children as young as mine. Needless to say, I was thrilled when I saw that How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen was coming out. Based on the principles of the original, it tailors the advice and techniques to younger kids, specifically ages two through seven.

The authors of the new book are a draw: Joanna Faber is the daughter of one of the authors of the original book, so not only did she grow up in an environment that used the techniques, she also believes in them for raising her own kids. Julie King, the coauthor, is a lifelong friend of Joanna’s who has also been around these philosophies for most of her life. For years, both Faber and King have been leading parenting workshops based on the How to Talk principles, and they bring their experience to this book. It is a combination of philosophy and technique and real-world examples, both from their own parenting journeys and from workshop participants.

The first part of the book is the nuts and bolts of it — the explanation of the techniques and how to use them. The second part uses the techniques in real world examples and specifically addresses some of the common challenges that arise in this age group; this is where you’ll find stories from actual parents on how they used the techniques to overcome tricky situations.

What are some of the tools that they recommend? Perhaps the most important is one that may be familiar to many: Acknowledge your child’s feelings, regardless of how ridiculous you may think they are in the moment. Another tool is to offer your child a choice rather than a command whenever you can. If you offer a limited choice, you can still get the desired outcome while your child feels that they have a little input and control. For example, a common refrain in the morning in our house is, “Would you like to go potty first or brush your teeth first?” I get the desired outcome no matter which option they choose (teeth brushed and empty bladders), and my twins feel as though they are a part of the process.

The authors include illustrations, highlight some important points to keep in mind, and provide quick summaries to help. There is a chapter that specifically addresses how the tools and techniques can be applied and adapted for children with sensory processing disorders and autism spectrum disorders. It’s also worth noting that one of the parents whose stories are used as examples throughout the book is a mother of twins; I’ve found that many parenting books don’t specifically address this unique dynamic, so I appreciated it. My copy of How to Talk So Little Kids Will Listen is highlighted like crazy, and, while I initially read it start to finish, it’s a book that I’ll revisit as I try to hone my skills when specific problems arise. I think it’s bound to become a go-to book for parents of young children.

As a grandparent, I wanted to review this to see how the children of this series of books had found some other things to write about and help parents learn about how to talk and work with younger children. This was well thought out, readable, and a great resource. I wish it had been available when my children were little and I was parenting my now grown children. I will be sure to gift this to my children as they start on their journeys with parenting. A gift to thinking parents anywhere and a wonderful resource. We all want to work with our children in the kindest, most forthright manner possible in a way that respects them, is kind, and helps us help them develop the tools to effectively communicate and work within a framework that will give them the most success in their lives. Another winner!

Read the first few pages and fell in love with the easy going feel of the book and the teaching. Plan to buy this for all the mothers in my life that have young children!

Essential for educators, caregivers, pedagogues, parents with toddlers, excellent for the socio-emotional development of the little ones!

Reading is fluid, very illustrative and has even amused me a lot. It was very funny that my inner child was so clearly identified in many of the examples given by the author. Undoubtedly the book's suggestions are based on extensive experience and research, Joanna Faber and Julie King know what they are talking about and know the basics of empathy and the power of connection with proper communication. Toddlers are perhaps the least understood by parents, is a very short stage but critical to their sense of belonging, emotional development, for the first steps to socialize and humanize.
As the father of a 4-year-old, I sometimes feel guilty about losing my temper and being unable to get along when he have angry bursts. I am amazed at the importance of developing empathic skills, recognizing and connecting with my child's emotions, and talking with him expressing genuine emotional support, and how they can make so much difference to get cooperation results. It is also of fundamental importance for me to establish a relationship and communication with my children that inspires more confidence and security, since I recognize that it is key to his self-esteem, develop his ability to resolve conflicts, and be happier.
My gratitude to the Publisher and NetGalley for allowing me to review the book

This is like taking a parenting class without having to leave the comfort of your house. I really liked how the book was laid out, it logically flowed well and the real world examples from different people was the most helpful. I did agree with some of the participants that it is a lot of work and it is, but even taking one or two of the suggestions can instantly improve your life.

This book is a useful way to train yourself to talk to your kids in a way that is productive and helps them to grow. The author has made the book easy to read in short bursts. It also helps a parent to feel validated in decisions that they are already making about interaction with their young child. A perfect gift for a baby shower or anyone working with your children on a frequent basis.

Great advice that you can start using immediately! A must read for parents and caregivers working with younger children.

This is a fabulous, easy to read resource filled with great ideas for anyone interacting and communicating with young children. We, as the adults in the situation, are shown how to focus on why a child's behaviour is occurring and the underlying emotions involved, rather than what the behaviour is. In this way we can support the child in a respectful, non-judgemental way to put his/her feelings into words and develop a more appropriate way of managing these feelings. Strategies are provided which will appeal to young children and which they can relate to. Using the strategies effectively may take some practice, but as the authors say "...you can mess up endlessly and it's okay. You can fix it." I loved the examples provided and identified with many of them, both as a mum and as a Speech Pathologist. Throughout the book, useful and interesting links to online articles and resources are provided to support and supplement the strategies suggested in this book. Thanks to Scribner and NetGalley for the ARC.