Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service

This book was so humorous. I think even when things were going wrong, they were hilarious.

So, basically Eli works for Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service--which is exactly how it sounds, a dating service for supernatural beings. What made it so funny was this whole idea of going door-to-door, hooking up the undead, and the creepy crawlies. From vampires, to goblins, Rasputin services them all. And Eli, is the person you call to certify their super-naturalness. Because, if this were real life, as in this book there would be some pretenders--pretending to be vamps, and such to hook up with real live ones.

The certification process was funny, the characters both important and momentary were funny. This book is just fun, and funny. It's to be taken lightly, so if you are looking for something more serious. this book is definitely not for you. There are a lot of talks of ghosts,vampires, getting laid, and saving the world from a slightly-overweight warlock.

I had a good time with this. The writing was cool, and the pacing was on point. Definitely a great read, if you're a fan of the supernatural--and you like to laugh. Just beware, Rasputin does not like pants, sports a lot of hair, and likes to get any and everyone into his hot tub--where a mermaid lives beneath the water.

Creatures of the night and other mystical beings might want to avoid the attention of ordinary folk, but the attention of other supernatural beings is still welcome--particularly in the love department. David D. Hammons' Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service depicts a reality where supernatural beings need a little help finding the right someone special.

Eli Kowalski works for Rasputin, a.k.a. Love Machine, certifying and helping supernatural creatures connect and find love. Eli has become adept at spotting the real deal from ordinary people who claim to be a supernatural being, often using stereotypes of a witch or vampire. On his latest certification, Eli is given an artifact that turns out to be the Tablet of Nicaea, which is rumored to be able to destroy all supernatural creatures. As Eli learns more about the Tablet from another certification job, a witch named Meri, he becomes entangled and invested in the plot of a witch calling himself Darkstar, who is keen on stealing the Tablet to remove his romantic competition so "nice guys" can finally get the girl.

Having been intrigued by the presence of established supernatural characters, the premise of them needing a dating service, and the vibrant cover art, I was excited to read this. The story developed and moved quickly while incorporating the mythos of the various supernatural creatures present in the literary and filmic canon, with a few additional nuances to their characters that helps to set this version apart from the pack. I was really getting into the story and enjoying the amusing antics of Rasputin, but when the villain turns out to just be a fedora wearing, friend-zone lamenting man-child, I lost some of my interest pretty quickly (because it's just eugh), even though the synopsis did warn of the "Men's Rights Activist" character - which just proves that the writing up to that point was engrossing, as it blocked out the memory of this unfortunate facet to the narrative.

Overall, I'd give it a 3.5 out of 5 stars.

A lighthearted entry into what, despite the title, is really fantasy detective noir. Perfect for cheering you up on a rainy weekend - not to mention illuminating an entirely unknown side to the indestructible Mad Monk! Good (not always clean) fun.

Is this story ridiculous? Yes, it is. Did I love it? Surprisingly, yes, I did. David Hammons reminds me of a young Christopher Moore, a silly storyteller with heart. If you can see the humor in an elderly mystic driving a phallic shaped hot rod while demanding that his dating service underlings call him "the Love Machine" then you may enjoy this story too.

I heartily recommend this book to all lovers of fun chaos, humor, magic and a certain amount of obscenities! This book promises and then it delivers exactly what was promised. If you need a pick me up or a funny read or just something silly to boost your spirits, look no further.
Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service is actually about the famous "Love Machine" Rasputin who decided to make it in America by providing America's supernatural with their ideal matches.
It's a hilarious idea and the execution is really wonderful. It's taking off with following Certifier Eli as he does his rounds, making sure that only the supernatural can make use of the service, weeding every non-magic folk with a piece of garlic and what not.
But very quickly the plot thickens presenting dangers and challenges and psychopathic evil characters whose problems stem from one thing and one thing only: they're just not getting laid!
If you're reading this and thinking: "Four stars for that? Lesia, are you for real?"
Hell yeah, I'm for real. This book is funny, it's uplifting, it sends a good message and it's not taking itself too seriously and that's something I think all of us need from time to time. Give this one a go. It's going to make you giggle.

I absolutely loved this book. Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service was a super fun fantasy novel, and I hope that there are more that feature Rasputin (Love Machine, LOL) and his crew of certifiers.

Eli is a normal guy, with an abnormal job. He works for Rasputin. Yes, that Rasputin. Yeah, the one who "died" in 1916. Only he didn't die. They tried all right, but it just wouldn't stick. Now Rasputin, or Love Machine, as he goes by, runs a dating service for supernaturals. His goal? Bring 'love' to everyone. Also, it stops the monsters from eating people. But in order to make sure that his 'love' matches are the real deal he has certifiers check people out for him. Eli is a certifier. He goes around to supposed supernatural being's homes and determines if they are the real deal. If they are they get added to the dating pool. If not? Sorry, no love for you.

It's at a routine certification with a vampire that Eli receives a tablet that can apparently kill every single supernatural being out there. Of course, the tablet is stolen by a crazy emo-loser witch, named Maxwell, wants it to do just that. Weirdly, because he can't get laid. Eli teams up with Maxwell's ex-girlfriend, a Supernatural FBI agent and some awesome supernaturals to try and retrieve the tablet before whiny emo guy can kill everyone off.

This book is super bizarre and fun. Rasputin, excuse me, Love Machine, is way over the top stereotypical horn dog, to the point where you know he means business when he puts on pants, and totally ridiculous. I loved him. Eli is a great character- he totally downplays his abilities and thinks he's nothing special, but has the ability to pull everyone together and get shit done. There's enough action to keep you interested without a ton of weird side plots.

This book was a lot of fun! Yes, it's absurd, yes, it's crazy, and yes, it's also weird. Maybe it's not for all, but it's fun, and it's hilarious and it's pure genius in some parts.
Eli, our main character, works for Rasputin's Supernatural Dating Service as certifier. And yes, the RSDS is exactly how it sounds: it helps Supernatural people of all the flavour to found a date, and yes, Rasputin is the original one, the one and only russian mystic. He believes that the love (or rather, to make love) is the right answer for all the problems (and he thinks also that if the supernatural can get a date, and can get laid, they would spend less time to eat or scare normal people).

Rasputin is a piece of work. He's always horny(he is perpetually in rut) and he calls himself (and makes the other call him, too) "The Love Machine". He's also immortal and indestructible and he never put on his pants.
You know that you are in a really dire situation if he has to put his pants on!
Rasputin alone is a really good reason to read this book. But it's not the only one. There are a lot of funny scenes and I smiled a lot while reading. It's not the best book ever, that's true, but it's so much fun! The author is brilliant and some scenes are really little artwork, like the first scene in wich we first met Eli and his work. He's a certifier, so he has to certify that a person is really a supernatural being. If you are a real one you can access the RSDS and you can meet other supernatural beings, but if you are a human who want to pass for something else you cannot access to the real database for the dating service. So a Certifier is needed to certify your true nature.
And we met Eli with one of their costumers, a woman who wants to pass as a vampire. She's not the real thing and the certification is really something. I laughed out loud!

The book is weird (weird, weird, weird!) and if you are feeling prude, this one is certainly not the book for you. But if you are in for a fun and an original reading, that's the book to go!
I really loved this one and I would read something other of this author, because I fall in love!

I would like to thank the author David Hammons for offering me a free electronic copy of this book as, quite simply, I love his work. Can one be in love with someone else’s imagination? Or is that just getting into the ultra-creepy cougar stalker zone?

Oh, and I also got offered a free electronic copy of the book, via Netgalley, by the publisher Curiosity Quills… so not totally stalker zone. ;-)

Can you tell I really liked this book and truly do love Mr Hammons’ imagination? Such a funny, sarcastic and whimsical view of urban fantasy… seriously going to have to get myself signed up as an over 40’s fan girl.

I have read other works by Mr Hammons, starting with ‘Alice takes back Wonderland’ and I thought it was… okay. But his ‘Don’t Eat the Glowing Bananas’! Oh my goodness! I have not loved such a skewed view of a dystopian world – ever! The humour and intelligence in that book was just so me!

And so, we come to ‘Rasputin’s Supernatural Dating Service’ from the blurb I did raise an eyebrow as I wondered if it would be at Alice level or Banana level… it was at Banana level. A brilliant, funny and whacky look into the world of urban fantasy. I simply loved it.

The only reason I’ve not given it the top score is there was just something lacking… maybe the slow start, I don’t know? But I just didn’t go bananas over it as much. Though by the end I was getting antsy and preying this was the first book in a series as my goodness! We have found Mr Pratchett’s replacement! The humour, sarcasm, irony and skewed outlook on life that so resonates with me - and will resonate with so many others – this is going to be a killer series. Hint hint there Mr Hammons!

Okay, enough gushing about the author – he’s probably getting a restraining order put together as you read this.

On to the book. ‘Rasputin’s Supernatural Dating Service’ did start a little slow for me and I did wonder if/ when it was going to get to the point. I mean, the plot was there and I got that… but our protagonist took a little too long to justify why he was the protagonist. Or maybe I was just too impatient? Who knows?

Loved the things to google mentioned throughout the book. I will not confirm or deny having used google to look up facts mentioned in the book… but, yeah, just adds that special level of humour within modern day reading. And what is it with Montana? Since I started reading this book I’ve heard a few similar comments on TV shows. Don’t tell me I may or may not have to google again!

The story was well worth it in the end as, when it got going, it really got going. The whole not exactly Men in Black, this is the reality of supernatural creatures in today’s society thing that ran throughout the book was fantastic. Made it a highly entertaining read. Just so glad the Winchester boys don’t know about RSDS!

Oh and Ivan… Just Yes. Is good for health. Yes.

Would I recommend this book to others?

Hell yes! Loved it, totally entertained by it and while you’re out buying it, go grab Mr Hammons other two books I’ve mentioned and thank me later. I like proper chocolate and free books. Just a hint. ;-)

And, as much as I feel my 12 year old would enjoy ‘Don’t Eat the Glowing Bananas’ (she keeps hearing me go on about it and so wants to read my copy) I don’t feel ‘Rasputin’s Supernatural Dating Service is as age appropriate. I suggest more your New Adults, rather than Young Adults as an audience. As well as we old cougars with a love of both the NA and YA genre! :-D

Would I buy this book for myself?

Uhhhh, let me think on that for a moment. Yes! Huge fan, not a stalker, just a fan. Would most definitely buy this book – and any more of the series to come. You should too. Thank me later. Remember proper chocolate.

In summary: for lovers of quirky, sarcastic, tongue in cheek urban fantasy that is still an adventure and has a HEA ending… this is the book for you. I highly recommend it!

Rasputin is an immortal mystic from Russia who has a way with supernaturals. Rasputin runs his agency from the golden hot club in his office and sends his agents throughout the country certifying legitimate supernaturals creatures for dating service access Rasputin’s goal was to spread love to all the supernaturals.Rasputin believes everything in life can be solved by love and sex.He now uses the name of Love Machine. Rasputin came to America and decide that if the supernatural had dates they wouldn’t harm humans. Eli is one of those agents. He starts having trouble when a vampire gives Eli an ancient artifact called The Tablet Of of Nicea. Which had a vast power and an evil witch named Maxwell begins looking for Eli so he could take the tablet and power for herself. .The tablet could kill every supernatural on earth. The tablet could kill every supernatural in the world. Eli then meets Meri who is an ex girlfriend of Maxwell. Who had helped him identify the tablet. Maxwell was a frustrated male witch who wanted the tablet to destroy all supernatural creature . He thinks that way girls/women will pay attention to nice guys like him. Maxwell then gets the tablet. A supernatural FBI agent Meri and some supernaturals to try to take the tablet back from Maxwell.
I liked this book. It wasn’t a serious book but funny and made me laugh and that was great. I have never seen monsters.supernatural's portrayed like in this book. I loved how the monsters had back stories. I loved how Eli thought he was nothing special when he was very special. I would have liked to heard more about the monsters that were dating. This had a silly good plot and was good writing and was well paced. I really like the action and romance . I liked the characters and ins and outs of this story and I recommend.

This was a great book that I read in two days. Cant wait to see the cover that the author chooses.