So You Want to Talk About Race

Ijeoma Oluo has surpassed expectations with this monumental masterpiece which deconstructs race with insight and clarity for all to better understand and address these issues!

Fantastic look at race for anyone who wants to (or doesn’t want to) talk about race. Gives great thought points for people of all races when it comes to discussing race, but should be a must read for white people who consider themselves to be racially aware, but probably aren’t.

Ijeoma Oluo has written a deeply insightful guide on how to discuss race and racism. It can be difficult to know where to start these conversations, but there are many concrete examples on how to begin dismantling systemic systems of racial oppression both on a individual interpersonal level and a larger scale. A phenomenal, timely book!

Do you ever accidentally inhale a book? Like, you meant to read it with your eyes, but, whoops, suddenly there it is, lodged in your esophagus and now you have to go to the hospital and explain, in various gestures, how you breathed in an entire book? This happens to me more often than I would like to admit. So You Want to Talk About Race, by Ijeoma Oluo, is just the latest instance. Thankfully, this was an eARC from NetGalley (thanks Perseus Books) and not a physical volume—though I’m certainly going to need to buy one, or maybe two, when it comes out.

This book is the first in what will hopefully be an avalanche of books to plug an embarrassing hole in my ongoing education. I’m trying to ride the intersectionality train, but if I’m doing an honest accounting of things, I have not been doing a great job of reading books by Black women when it comes to issues like feminism and race. It has literally been a whole year since I read Roxane Gay’s amazing short story collection Difficult Women. More recently I did read Between the World and Me, and Coates obviously touches on some of the same issues that Oluo does here. But the two books are very different, both in terms of audience and purpose.

So You Want to Talk About Race is clear and upfront about what it is and what it is trying to do. Oluo is uncompromising (emphasis mine):

> So a good question to ask yourself right now is: why are you here? Did you pick up this book with the ultimate goal of getting people to be nicer to each other? Did you pick up this book with the goal of making more friends of different races? Or did you pick up this book with the goal of helping fight a system of oppression that is literally killing people of color? Because if you insist on holding to a definition of racism that reduces itself to “any time somebody is mean to somebody of a different race” then this is not the book to accomplish your goals.

Each chapter title is a question, the chapter being Oluo’s answer: “What if I talk about race wrong?”, “Why am I always being told to check my privilege”, “What is cultural appropriation?”, “What are microaggressions?”, “I just got called racist, what do I do now?”—there seventeen, so I won’t list them all here, but they are, every single one, fantastic. I could go on, chapter-by-chapter, for quite some length about all the wonderful parts of this book. Instead, I’ll highlight some of her explanation of cultural appropriation:

> Cultural appropriation is the product of a society that prefers its culture cloaked in whiteness. Cultural appropriation is the product of a society that only respects culture cloaked in whiteness. Without that—if all culture (even the culture that appropriators claim to love and appreciate) were equally desired and respected, then imitations of other cultures would look like just that—imitations. If all cultures were equally respected, then wearing a feathered headdress to Coachella would just seem like the distasteful decision to get trashed in sacred artifacts….
>
> … because we do not live in a society that equally respects all cultures, the people of marginalized cultures are still routinely discriminated against for the same cultural practices that white cultures are adopting and adapting for the benefit of white people.

I’ve had the cultural appropriation conversation with fellow white people before, and I’ve struggled to explain it sufficiently (the best I can do is link to this explainer from Everyday Feminism). Oluo’s chapter has helped me to realize that, often, I make the mistake of letting the conversation fall back into the unproductive territory of discussing specific examples (“well what about X, is X cultural appropriation?”) when (a) I can’t answer that because I’m not a member of that culture and (b) that’s not actually what cultural appropriation is about. Cultural appropriation, as Oluo explains here, is about the wider trends and power imbalances within our society. It’s why, to certain parts of white society, Macklemore is an artist while Tupac was a thug. But my conversations would often divert away from these crucial parts of the discussion, straying towards the more defensive territories (see Chapter 16: “I just got called racist, what do I do now?”).

This book is full of so many useful ideas, tips, and strategies—particularly for white people who want to be allies to racialized people. The aforementioned chapter 16 and chapter 4, which deals with privilege and “checking” it, are both essential reminders, even for someone like myself who has already been engaging with social justice for a while now. I’ve carefully avoided using the word “primer” to describe this book. It’s accurate, but I don’t want to pigeonhole it as some kind of introductory text. Certainly, if you are a newcomer to these issues, this book is accessible. But there is so much here for readers of every level of familiarity with the issues. If you are truly open to learning more about social justice and how to dismantle institutionalized racism, you are going to find useful ideas here, in plain language you’ll understand, and in a tone that helps you hear her frustration but also her intense empathy for humanity, and her hope for a better future (because you don’t write a book like this if you think dismantling racism is a lost cause). Oluo’s writing style never wavers from being confrontational and candid—she is not trying to appease anyone—but it’s also witty and incisive.

A few parts of this book get a little bit into specifics of American anti-Black racism, but by and large, almost all of the topics for discussion are relevant to a wider audience. As Oluo herself points out, Canada has its share of problems with racism. (A lot of it is directed much more vociferously towards Indigenous people—if you want momre information on that, check out Chelsea Vowel’s Indigenous Writes, or Tanya Talaga’s Seven Fallen Feathers, about the intersection of racism and violence in my own city of Thunder Bay. For writing on anti-Black racism in Canada, particularly state-sponsored racism like carding and brutality, I’ll point you towards Desmond Cole.) Moreover, Canada absorbs (whether we like it or not) much of its cultural fare from our neighbours down south, so even if policies like affirmative action or United States Supreme Court decisions don’t quite affect us in the same way, the attitudes seen in media and the language being used still does. I never felt like Oluo was losing me by spending too much time talking about American-specific concerns.

So I can make a few guarantees, here. First, if you read this, you’re going to learn something—hopefully lots of things. Oluo will crystallize notions that might already be forming in your head or introduce you to ideas and show you a new way entirely of looking at things. Second, if you read this, you will come away with a praxis for actually doing the work—it isn’t enough to read books like this and then pat yourself on the back for being “woke”. That’s what the final chapter is all about, and boy, are there ever some practical tips. That’s why I’m going to be buying a copy of this book since I received a review copy for free—because we need to pay Black women when they do the work of educating us.

So You Want to Talk About Race is everything I’d look for in a book on social justice issues. It’s informative, educational, and thought-provoking. It is topical in the post-Trump sense of the word. It hits that sweet spot of being academic and smart but also accessible—this is by far one of my favourite non-fiction books I’ve read all year, and probably the best I’ve received on NetGalley (Beyond Trans and The Radium Girls are close runners-up).

If you are at all interested in social justice, in dismantling racism, in making our world a better place, this is a must-read. Show up. Do the work.

Part memoir and part handbook, Ijeoma Oluo’s new book is not just about talking: it’s about action. Oluo addresses two distinct audiences: people of color and white people who hope to engage in dialogue about race. She makes it clear early on that her book is not some magic cure for white supremacy, but is instead a tool to open doors. Using chapter titles which focus in on key terms in the discussion about race in America (like tone-policing, the school-to-prison pipeline, and intersectionality), she creates an easy to engage with collection of short essays.

Each chapter balances some amount of personal experience with tips for both of her communities. For instance, in her chapter about about natural hair, she not only discusses stories where her personal space was invaded, she explains ways for white people to support black beauty without feeling the need to touch it. Every chapter reinforces the experiences of communities of color facing daily microaggressions while also giving questions to consider for how to improve dialogue.

I read Oluo’s book in less than twenty-four hours. Her direct prose will not apologize and doesn’t want your apologies either (at least if they are just empty words). The chapters are brief enough for a single sitting, or for later reference, but long enough to reflect fully on the topic at hand.

Readers hoping for hand-holding or reassurances that their good intentions are enough should look elsewhere. This book is for today. It recognizes that we all fail, that we are often blind to our privilege, and it suggests a path forward in the final chapter in real and tangible ways that move beyond performative allyship.

Pick up Oluo’s book if you’re looking for ways to steer conversation inside or outside of your racial community, engaging on the internet or in person.

(Thank you to NetGalley for an ARC in exchange for my honest review)

[NOTE: This is part of a 1400-word review that I hope to get published at an online publication. I will share the full link if/when it is published.]

. . . With this book, Ijeoma Oluo gives us — both white people and people of color — that language to engage in clear, constructive, and confident dialogue with each other about how to deal with racial prejudices and biases. And this dialogue is critical. As she writes toward the end: “Words are always at the heart of all our problems, and the beginning of all our solutions.”

Let me say at the outset: this book is for everyone — white or black or any color in between. If you are white, it will make you see nuances of racism that you were probably not aware of, including within yourself, your loved ones, and coworkers. If you are a person of color, it will give you ways to respond calmly, rationally, and intelligently, even when dealing with the well-meaning “I’m not racist” white friend or coworker.

Each chapter is framed as a question which Oluo unpacks thoroughly and rationally. These are questions that typically come up in daily interactions, whether they are raised explicitly, implicitly, or only in our heads. And, since the last US election, they have also been popping up all across social media, over dinner-tables, and even in workplaces. Some of the questions seek to define loaded words/phrases and their implications: racism, intersectionality, police brutality, privilege, affirmative action, cultural appropriation, microaggressions, and so on. Some of them address the constant arguments you might come across on social media, like “why can’t I say the “N” word?” and “I just got called racist, what do I do?”

With each question, Oluo is consistent in her approach of first explaining why it matters, debunking some of the common beliefs/misunderstandings around it, describing its symptoms and impacts with facts and data, explaining why it needs to be discussed/addressed, instructing how to adjust one’s own frame of mind in approaching any related conversation, and providing practical checklists of what to say/do and remember/consider for an effective response.

Oluo’s primary underlying theme is that we are dealing with systemic racism built over centuries rather than individual acts of oppression. Throughout, she points out how this racism is built into all aspects of our culture, our institutions, our movements, and our everyday social behaviors and, more, importantly, how we can know for sure when something is about race. Whether we consider ourselves “racist” or not, we are part of a racist system. In fact, it is often our advantages that keep us from seeing the disadvantages of others. And, no matter how well-intentioned we might be as individuals, our complacency with that system makes us all complicit . . .

This book is a fantastic read about race, including many aspects involved in race, including intersectionality, cultural appropriation, microaggressions, affirmative action and more. Oluo draws upon her life experience as a black woman as well the experiences of others and important race-related statistics. She acknowledges that some of the information will be uncomfortable, and as a white woman, I agree with this. By and large, I found her to be thoughtful, fair, learned, intelligent, and clear. She uses terrific analogies which are relatable to many types of people. I don't agree with everything she puts forward and there's one area in particular where I would have chosen to use different phrasing, but that's a personal point of view and in no way detracted from my reading experience and increase in knowledge and understanding from the read. Race is such an important topic to address and not hide from so that we can improve the lives of all people in our country and world. Oluo provides an outstanding foundation for readers to move forward.

An incredibly honest and helpful critical look at the small and hard to discuss details about race that are so often misunderstood, Very valuable to read.

A current, constructive, and actionable exploration of today's racial landscape, offering straightforward clarity that readers of all races need to contribute to the dismantling of the racial divide.

In So You Want to Talk About Race, Editor at Large of The Establishment Ijeoma Oluo offers a contemporary, accessible take on the racial landscape in America, addressing head-on such issues as privilege, police brutality, intersectionality, micro-aggressions, the Black Lives Matter movement, and the "N" word. Perfectly positioned to bridge the gap between people of color and white Americans struggling with race complexities, Oluo answers the questions readers don't dare ask, and explains the concepts that continue to elude everyday Americans.

Oluo is an exceptional writer with a rare ability to be straightforward, funny, and effective in her coverage of sensitive, hyper-charged issues in America. Her messages are passionate but finely tuned, and crystalize ideas that would otherwise be vague by empowering them with aha-moment clarity. Her writing brings to mind voices like Ta-Nehisi Coates and Roxane Gay, and Jessica Valenti in Full Frontal Feminism, and a young Gloria Naylor, particularly in Naylor's seminal essay "The Meaning of a Word." (via Goodreads)

I received an eARC of So You Want to Talk About Race from Netgalley, courtesy of the publisher, Seal Press, in exchange for an honest review.

I'm a regular reader of The Establishment, which Ijeoma Oluo edits, so I knew that I would like this book. What I didn't realize is that I will be buying a copy of this for at least four of my friends.

This book is a primer that works hard not to alienate its reader. Oluo makes sure that all of her readers have a base knowledge of the topics she discusses - privilege, intersectionality, police brutality, affirmative action, the school to prison pipeline, the history and impact of the n-word, cultural appropriation, the ever popular touching of black people's hair (just don't), microaggressions, the "angry" black person, what happens when you get called racist, and what we can do other than talk.

This book is full of personal examples, statistics, and race theory, as well as the genuine answers to the bullshit responses that you'll hear if you start talking about race.

This book is devastatingly important for all of us to read, particularly the more privileged of us in America. There isn't a single word in here that isn't necessary to tell the story we all need to hear. 

If you pick up a copy on Amazon or Indiebound, I can guarantee you won't be disappointed.

Disclaimer: All links to Indiebound and Amazon are affiliate links, which means that if you buy through those links, I will make a small amount of money off of it.

This thought provoking book has quickly become one of my favorites, so much so that I would recommend it for students of sociology as well as those enrolled in high school. The book is well written and organized to beautifully discuss, with reason, the subject of race and societal inequities. The book assumes nothing, and rationally discusses the definition of racism and how to unemotionally converse with others about it. The author handles the subject rationally and gives the reader pause to think about their own perspectives.

I enjoyed reading this book and will recommend it to my adult classes as a way to reframe race in society today. Big ideas start small and this author has given us all a framework to begin.

Thank you to the publisher and NetGalley for the opportunity to read an Advanced Reader Copy in exchange for an honest review.

So You Want to Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo. #SoYouWantToTalkAboutRace #NetGalley

Ijeoma Oluo's So You Want to Talk About Race is an important book. It serves as a good introduction to social justice issues. More importantly, in a very accessible manner, her book takes you through examples regarding how to start talking about race. And it focuses not just on educating the reader about these topics but also the need to take actions. She considers many key topics, including privilege, intersectionality, police brutality, the school-to-prison pipeline, and cultural appropriation.

I think that this book is ideal for people interested in learning more about social justice issues and who wants to learn about what they can do. It will be a good read for those more versed in these issues, too, although it may not teach those individuals as much.

This is a good book for those who have just started thinking about race issues. Would recommend for those who are interested in the Black Lives Matter movement and/or intersectional politics and need guidance in articulating these ideas.

So You Want To Talk About Race by Ijeoma Oluo

I loved this book. I finished it in a day simply devouring Oluo’s word. I can relate to so much of what Oluo was sharing and in so many ways it was validating but also depressing. I feel better knowing that I’m not the only person experiencing these microaggressions, working through these issues and surviving day to day but at the same time having these similar lived experiences makes me very well aware of how far we have to come in the U.S. when it comes to dealing with race, racism and equality.

So You Want To Talk About Race is a really well written, comprehensive look at the issue of race and how race relates to inequality, success, poverty, education and much more. When I took a look at the contents of the book I was blown away because I could recognize immediately that these topics were geared towards having a thorough conversation about race and not just placating people who want to feel like they are putting in the work. She included topics like intersectionality, privilege, affirmative action and addressed them head on, pointing out the arguments in each and encouraging readers to recognize and acknowledge where they stand on these different issues. I was hooked from the first page of the introduction. Oluo has a very straightforward writing style and she is extremely well grounded in herself and her voice. That assuredness allowed Oluo to expose herself and her personal experiences in ways that I could never imagine.

I hope this book speaks to you. I hope this book challenges you and makes you rethink your past experience. And that goes for every person regardless of race, gender, religion or anything in between. There were people that I had in mind while reading this book. Mostly people whose friendships I had to reevaluate in the last year because I realized how much of me they didn’t see and how much of my experience they didn’t recognize. Oluo’s book saw me and saw the struggle taking place right now. I am so thankful for this book and the effect that it could have on those willing to learn, willing to talk and willing to make a change when it comes to race.

This book is a must read. It made me uncomfortable at times, but that is exactly what is needed. Highly recommend.

Thank you, Ijeoma Oluo, for an incredibly thoughtful and engaging book on talking about race. This book is a fantastic contribution to discussions that are admittedly difficult, but that we all need to be engaging in. Everyone should read this book.

In this series of essays, Ijeoma Oluo addresses how to approach discussions of race, ranging from the importance of intersectionality to the school to prison pipeline and everything in between. Oluo never sugar coats the very serious issues she’s addressing in these pages, and states up front that this book will probably make a lot of readers uncomfortable. That’s probably true, but it’s also true that sometimes we need to be uncomfortable in order to learn and accept hard truths.

This book wasn’t always an easy read—as a white person in America, I understand despite whatever good intentions I may have, I have not only benefited from a history and institution of racism in this country, but that I have also, at times, contributed to it. That’s not a fun thing to recognize, but it is important, and I think Oluo’s essays do a phenomenal job of explaining not only how we should talk about race and racism, but also why we should. I can say without a doubt that the things I read and learned in this book are going to stay with me. I think everyone, whoever you are, whatever background you’re coming from, should read this book. Whatever your race or ethnicity, however informed or uninformed you think you are, you need to read this book. I really just can't recommend it enough.

Have you ever had a difficult conversation about race where you felt like everything went wrong? Have you avoided talking about race because you're afraid you won't say the right thing? Do you feel like you should be doing more to dismantle a racially unjust political and social system?

Ijeoma Oluo has written a timely, clear, and comprehensive guide to tackling complicated topics about race. She answers questions like:
"Is it really about race?"
"What is the school-to-prison pipeline?"
"Why can't I touch your hair?"
"I just got called racist, what do I do now?"
...and more in a way that is concise, accessible, and backed by data. This book must have been an enormous undertaking to write, but the product is so perfectly executed that I couldn't help but read it in one sitting.

I truly can't recommend it highly enough. EVERYONE SHOULD READ THIS BOOK. EVERYONE SHOULD READ THIS BOOK MORE THAN ONCE. EVERYONE SHOULD HAVE A COPY OF THIS AT HOME FOR REFERENCE. The only way to create systemic and cultural change is to engage in difficult conversations with those of the same race, those of different races, people in your family and your community and your office. And once you finish this book, don't stop there, because it's about more than one book by one person. Take the actionable steps Oluo includes in the book. Read other books, like The New Jim Crow and Sister Citizen and Stamped from the Beginning. Support POC in all areas of society. No matter where you are on your path to fighting racism, this book has something to offer you.

Thanks so much to Netgalley and Seal Press for providing me this ARC in exchange for an honest review.

I have been a fan of Ijeoma Oluo’s writing for the last few years, having discovered her first via The Establishment, an online publication that supports marginalized writers and creators. They cover a wide range of topics ranging from politics to kink, and I have learned so much from so many of their writers. So naturally, when their Editor-In-Chief (whom I admire greatly) was coming out with a book on race, I jumped at the opportunity to obtain an advanced copy.

In the last couple of years I’ve been better about reading nonfiction books on social issues; reading is the best way I learn and as I’ve become more aware and involved in the understanding of systemic oppression and how they’ve led to current events. Specifically, I’ve leaned towards reading books on these topics by women of color. This education is ongoing, and I have to recommend Oluo’s book as an important resource to us non-Black people who are here and willing to engage in these conversations.

The book opens with clear intentions; talking about race isn’t easy or comfortable and you’re not going to get it right immediately or all the time, but they are necessary because they’re not going anywhere just because you don’t talk about it.

“For many white people, this book may bring you face-to-face with issues of race and privilege that will make you uncomfortable…But a centuries-old system of oppression and brutality is not an easy fix, and maybe we should not look for easy reads. I hope that if parts of this book make you uncomfortable, you can sit with that discomfort for a while, to see if it has anything else to offer you.”

Divided into chapters that each handle a different topic, all related to race, and all established in the form of questions, this book is almost a 250-page FAQ on race, if you will. Topics include “Is it really about race”, “Why am I always being told to check my privilege?”, “What is intersectionality and why do I need it?”, “I just got called racist, what do I do now?”- you get the idea. Each of the chapters respond to the title question, and every single one of them is absolutely fantastic. They are coherent, easy to comprehend, and come with clear-cut actionable steps one can take.

It’s really hard for me not to go through and share every paragraph I highlighted in this book because there’s just too many, but I can share with you a story that illustrates its utility. A day before reading this book, my sister and I were having a conversation about privilege, and we kept getting stuck in the “just because someone is rich doesn’t mean they aren’t hardworking and haven’t earned the rewards” argument. Try as I might, I couldn’t articulately explain how privilege worked in this context. The next day, I happened to be reading Ijeoma’s book, and came across the chapter on privilege. I offered to read it out loud to my sister, and this is the paragraph (in addition to the detailed example provided prior to it) with which I was able to get through to her:

“We don’t want to think that we are harming others, we do not want to believe that we do not deserve everything we have, and we do not want to think of ourselves as ignorant of how our world works. The concept of privilege violates everything we’ve been told about the American Dream of hard work paying off and good things happening to good people. We want to know that if we do “a” we can expect “b”, and that those who never get “b” have never done “a”. The concept of privilege makes the world seem less safe. We want to protect our vision of a world that is fair and kind and predictable. That reaction is natural, but it doesn’t make the harmful effects of unexamined privilege less real.”

This book comes with so many such real, relatable moments, which is what makes it so accessible. Don’t be fooled by it’s tone; Ijeoma is not here to let us off the hook. She is candid about the very real, very deep pain and frustration she experiences, caused by navigating a racist society, and while is understanding of the fear and hesitation that audience members might have about talking about race, she doesn’t attempt to shield them from it, and is very clear that such discomfort is necessary in this learning process. Being an ally isn’t easy, nor is it a badge of honor one can bestow upon themselves- the work needs to be done.

it would be reductive to call this book an introductory text to race conversations; the language is simple and it won’t alienate novices, but the topics are day-to-day only in their occurence. The discussions itself are very nuanced, because dismantling systemic oppression can’t happen in one stroke, and this book lends itself to the ongoing nature of such conversations. Some of the topics are very American-centric, but the overall themes are still so relevant and applicable to non-American contexts. The book also comes with a lot of practical suggestions and tips. Like a lot of things, you can’t have these conversations perfectly from the get go- we’re going to make mistakes, and the only way to get better at them is to keep practicing having them. We have to do the work.

So You Want To Talk About Race has made it to my all-time favorite kind of social justice book- sheer accessibility with an academic bent. I meant to take it slow but found myself unable to put it down; I was drawn in from the get-go. I urge every single one of you to pick up this book. There’s so much to learn from it, not only in the understanding of systemic oppression, but tangible steps to dismantle it in our everyday lives. So timely, thought-provoking, educational, and necessary.

This book is a must read no matter the race. Very well presented,thought provoking and conversation provoking also. The author presents her infomation very well and precise. This book should be read with an open heart, eyes and mind. I am sure you will see, feel and experience something you may not have normally. A must read. Thanks to NetGalley, the author and the publsiher for the ARC of this book in return for my honest review.

Oluo writes for those ready to have an honest and meaningful conversation about race. She is direct and commands the readers thoughtfulness and attention. I can’t wait to put this in the hands of students who are at the beginning of their intellectual understanding of the dynamics of race.

This book will be very helpful to students in order to learn about race and social justice issues. There is a great deal of information and insight.

Reviewed on Goodreads:

Go. Read. This. Book. Well written, informative, and concerned with the reader learning, not just the author being right.

You should read this:
• If you want to talk about racial topics better
• If you’re great at talking about race
• If you never want to talk about race

Everyone should read this book. This should be the very next book you read.