Happiness Will Follow

I do not know if migrant families really talk about the challenges of being family as migrants, and the many different ways of being family that they experience. These involve both geographical and cultural distances, and the impact of this on the different generations. My family certainly didn't really speak much about these issues when I was a child.

The distance might be physical such as living in a place which is far from your country of origin, or people or tribe of origin. The distance might be less if you are truly connected to your community of origin in the place you live. The challenge of living in two cultures, or living in one but being disconnected from the other can be hightened by the country you live in and whether you are truly welcomed there.

This book has a subtle way of reminding the reader that migrant families experience various kinds of disconnections which can echo through generations. Eventually the disconnections can be healed by the passage of time and the creation of new families and communities. When people tell me they are American but their great grandmother was from Italy you know that at some point that grandmother and some of the generations after her may have experienced cultural and family disconnections and even some kind of dislocation.

In this book the author captures some of these disconnections through a story about his childhood and his relationship with his mother. I found it moving and painful, but it was very good to read. Michael had struggles with his mother as a child and as an adult. Their relationship was difficult and there was violence. The kind of violence that can erupt from within desperation. His mother struggled with poverty but worked hard to bring her son up but it was an incredibly painful upbringing.

With her death, Michael begins to see the cracks and the fault lines in her life and how they affected him. He is then able to see the fault lines and gaps in his own life. This is a beautiful memoir even though it is painful. It is beautiful because it captures the pain and difficulties of life but at the same time there is hope.

I loved this book because I could recognise some of those same fault lines my life. Questions about where I truly belong. Where is home for me? In the country of my birth or my country of origin? Is my home the same as my son's home? It is a question faced by migrant families all over the world and faced by the generations that come after them. Those cultural questions are familiar to me but thankfully the abuse is not. The abuse Micheal grew up with made those questions all the more complex and challenging and this book in a way is trying to respond to those complexities.

As a single mother of a son it was good to read this. My relationship with my son is peaceful and as a highly educated working woman I was able to give him a good upbringing but so many people struggle to do this whether single or not. This book made me realise that we can only do as much as we can for our children and that as parents we should be kind to ourselves. So this was altogether an amazing read for me in so many ways because it led to lots of reflection and letting go.

It is a powerful story which anyone can appreciate. We may not have questions about culture and country, we may not have questions about belonging, but many of us have questions about life and family and our upbringing.

The author also explores poverty and the way it can erode and stifle life. He doesnt use those words but he portrays it in the story he tells. The story really emphasises the struggle with poverty, isolation and hardship but the author softly reminds us not to judge.

The artwork is really good with very clear drawings which convey the emotions of the characters. The story also has a nice balance between prose and pictures. I dislike graphic novels with too much text and this book gets the balance just right. Although this is heart wrenching in places, the author gives us hope by showing us his own family and trying to reconcile his relationship with his mother. He really shows that he loved her despite the hardship. He also shows his own capacity for love and forgiveness in a really poignant way. I really appreciate the opportunity I have had to review this.

Copy provided by Boom! Studios and Archaia publications via Netgalley in exchange for an unbiased review.

Thank you to NetGalley and the publisher for providing this book in exchange for an honest review.

I feel like this hit me too hard. I identify with so many of the situations that he was in, and that was hard to see. But necessary. The way he showed us how hard and difficult his situation was, was so raw, it moved me in so many ways.
Everything in this is exactly what this type of abuse looks like. The conflicted feeling of hating and loving your abuser, his anger, the feeling that you just can't take it anymore...
I would recommend to everyone, especially those who have kids and/or have been in this situation