Why Is My Child in Charge?

Solve typical toddler challenges with eight key mindshifts that will help you parent with clarity, calmness and self-control.
Through stories from her practice, Claire Lerner shows parents how making critical mindshifts—seeing their children’s behaviors through a new lens —empowers parents to solve their most vexing childrearing challenges. This process puts parents back in the driver’s seat, where they belong and where their children need them to be. These real life stories provide a roadmap for how to tune into the root causes of children’s behavior and how to create and implement strategies that are tailored to the unique needs of each child and family. Through these stories, Claire provides a treasure trove of practical solutions that are based in science and which work in real life. Why Is My Child In Charge? picks up where other books have left parents hanging. Most parenting books offer solutions that sound good on paper but don’t work in practice. They are aspirational rather than achievable, or they offer one-size-fits-all approaches that don’t meet the needs of an individual child. They can compound parents’ feelings of frustration and thus, can be counterproductive. Case by case, Claire unpacks the individualized process she guides parents through to solve the most common challenges such as throwing tantrums in public; delaying bedtime for hours; refusing to participate in family mealtimes; and resisting potty training. Employing a relatable story-telling approach, Claire elucidates: The faulty mindsets that pose obstacles to parents seeing the situation more objectively The essential mindshifts that enable parents to quickly identify the root causes of the problem The development of an action plan tailored to each unique child and family Why is My Child in Charge? is like having a child development specialist in your home. It shows how you can develop “win-win” strategies that translate into adaptable, happy kids and calm, connected and in-control parents. It will help you be the parent you want to be.
Claire Lerner, MSW, is a licensed clinical social worker and child development specialist. She served as the Director of Parenting Resources at ZERO TO THREE for more than 18 years. Claire has also been a practicing clinician for 33 years, partnering with parents to do the detective work of decoding their children’s behavior to solve their most vexing childrearing challenges. She also provides training to local preschools and pediatric residents. Claire is the author of hundreds of parenting resources, including books, blogs, podcasts and videos. She writes a column for PBS Kids and her work has been published by multiple parenting publications. She has served as a content expert for numerous national daily newspapers. Claire is the mother of two very spirited children, Sam (30) and Jess (28), and two step-children, Justin (30) and Sammy (27), She lives in Bethesda, Maryland with her husband and two, also very spirited, pups.

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