Worst Knights Ever

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Pub Date Aug 22 2023 | Archive Date Sep 14 2023

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Description

It's autumn 2001, and a fire-breathing dragon is destroying London.

With most of her military overseas, the Queen decides to do what previous Queens would've done and call in her Knights!  The only problem is that the Queen has only knighted celebrities. This is the story of the four brave knights who heed their country’s call: Sir Michael Caine, Sir Elton John, Sir Anthony Hopkins, and Sir Sean Connery.

This is an irreverent comic adventure novel, populated by real celebrities, which started life as a much-talked-about Hollywood screenplay nearly 20 years ago. At the time, it was unheard of for actors to parody themselves on screen – Michael Caine and Elton John were on board, but Sean Connery eventually declined, and the film fell through. But now, reality-based films and tv shows are part of popular culture. The time for Worst Knights Ever is NOW.

ABOUT THE AUTHOR

Dane Hanson is an award-winning filmmaker, television producer, comedy writer, and author. Dane got his start in Hollywood acting in more than 60 national commercials. He is internet-famous for "Lie Detector," a video that is still constantly going viral all over the internet. It has over 100 million views combined and has been translated into 16 languages. 

For 11 years, Dane ran the critically-acclaimed sketch comedy show Sitcoms Blow. Working as head writer and director for 65 actors at its peak and performing more than 1500 live shows that's where Dane really developed his comedic writing and directing tools. "Lie Detector" was first performed live at Sitcoms Blow. 

In 2007, at the height of his commercial acting success, repeatedly starring as the dumb guy in beer commercials, Dane was diagnosed with Thyroid cancer. Dane beat cancer and eventually recovered, but it took years. With his acting career derailed, Dane pivoted to writing and producing TV. Dane produced a bunch of shows for Fox. He gave Taylor Tomlinson her TV debut on Laughs. She obviously would've landed on TV without his help, though. He was also head writer and Co-EP of Punchline, which was renewed for a second season. Dane was Supervising Producer for Top 30, which got picked up for three years. Dane is also a frequent collaborator with comedian Steve Hofstetter. 

Dane also wrote, directed, and starred in The Female Orgasm Law, another original Sitcoms Blow sketch, which won the Audience Award for Best Comedy Short at the prestigious 2012 Friars Club Comedy Festival. 

In 2021, Dane was named a finalist at UCLA for best spec script for his filthy episode of What We Do in the Shadows. 

Worst Knights Ever is the hilarious tale of four celebrities who volunteer to hunt down the dragon and try and save all of London. 



It's autumn 2001, and a fire-breathing dragon is destroying London.

With most of her military overseas, the Queen decides to do what previous Queens would've done and call in her Knights! The only...


Advance Praise

"Hilarious and irreverent! The only thing I don't like about this is that I didn't think of this premise first." - Steve Hofstetter, comedian

"Hilarious and irreverent! The only thing I don't like about this is that I didn't think of this premise first." - Steve Hofstetter, comedian


Available Editions

EDITION Paperback
ISBN 9798851661662
PRICE £11.50 (GBP)
PAGES 306

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Average rating from 24 members


Featured Reviews

When London is attacked by a dragon, the Queen calls her Knights to save the city. Sir Sean Connery assembles three other volunteering knights, Anthony Hopkins, Elton John and Micheal Caine to fight the menace and Spielberg films it all in this hilarious specimen of British wit.

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This book is bloody ridiculous but in the best way possible. It's not often that a novel causes me to laugh out loud, but Worst Knights Ever did … many, many times. I guess the best way I can think of to describe it is that it's kind of like if you took a Monty Python sketch and mixed it with a Christoper Moore novel and threw in a whole bunch of British celebrities?

And speaking of British celebrities, this novel has a very star-studded “cast.” There are the celebrity knights (Sean Connery, Anthony Hopkins, Michael Caine, and Elton John), of course, but lots of other famous Brits also make an appearance: Rowan Atkinson, Eddie Izzard, David Bowie, Richard Branson, Ricky Gervais, the list goes on and on. And if you're Canadian, American, or Australian and hoping for some representation, no worries! This book has you covered too.

The humor is crude – Elton John in particular is a master of the double entendre – and definitely not for the prudish. Hamster lovers should absolutely, under no circumstances, read this book. But if you're okay with phrases like “a rapist version of Anakin Skywalker” and blowjob jokes about the Queen (not a fabulous mental image, but, hey, at least it wasn't Charles, amirite?), you'll probably love this. As well you should. It's hilarious.

My one tiniest of complaints is that this book reads a lot like a screenplay … which makes sense, I suppose, since that's what it was originally intended to be. I also thought that the first half was a little funnier than the rest, but I still found myself chuckling to the very end. These issues are very minor quibbles, however, and I'm so hoping that someone makes a movie out of this one – I'd be there to watch it on opening night, for sure.

Many thanks to NetGalley and PsychoToxin Press for providing me with an advance copy of this book to review!

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I would like to start by thanking the authors for giving me the best laughs I have had in a long time! This is a book that you need to read as I feel no review could do it justice, it’s like Viz only so much better

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This book is hilarious! Monty Pythonesque comedy!
It’s 2001, like most of the world, London is wholly unprepared for a dragon attack .For the first time in documented history, a dragon has decided to take up residence in London, and snack on its inhabitants. Unable to turn to her allies for assistance, the Queen calls on her Knights, as done in the days of old, to help rid England of the legendary monster. The only problem is, these days the only Knights on hand are British celebrities, and apparently a gardener.
This comedy brings together a band of unlikely characters to save their country all while using satire, innuendos and wit.
From Corgi and Dorgi snacks and misplaced hamsters, to willy and bum eulogies. This novel has all the makings of a British comedy. I honestly hope to see it as a movie one day.

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