While there are certain things peppered throughout this book that I don’t necessarily agree with, I do think it is a good book for Christian youth to read who are looking for answers to achieve a moral foundation sexually as well as parents who are trying to figure out how to approach the topic with their children. It’s definitely something that needs to be taught at home more. We can’t depend or rely on our schools or churches to teach this, nor should we. Parents need to enlighten and educate their children on the dangers as well as the beauty of sex and this book gives a lot of great pointers as to how to do that.

This book was amazing. As a young adult that is single, I can say that this is so true. It is amazing that there is a book finally talking about it. All throughout High School, it was a common thing for people to hook-up. It became an expectation. Even other Christians fell under the influence and pressure of the main-stream.

This book is so helpful and something every Christian should read, especially the Young Adults and Singles looking for someone.

I loved everything about this book and appreciated the message behind it.

Highly recommend.

Barb Winters writes as a mom and a fierce advocate for those in the midst of a chaotic environment of sexual tension. Her thoughts are well reasoned, backed by scripture, and tested in the real world crucible of a blended family. She writes as one wounded by the fight, but also as one who has seen the fight through to a victory. Every parent could benefit greatly from reading this book. If you haven't faced the issue yet in your family, you live alone and under a rock! Our children, grandchildren and our spouses need our help navigating these turbulent waters. This book is an excellent resource to guide you along that path.

As a Christian mom of 2 young children this book was a good read in mentally preparing me for things that may be to come. How to address sex related topics with my children, and what red flags to look for.
Sex with the newer generation is something that is changing, the "casual" nature of these things is changing and these are things we need to be prepared to discuss with our children in the future.
I found this book insightful and helpful and will likely reference back as my kids get older.

Sexuality and relationships remain significant issues for Christians to navigate, and all the more so in terms of raising children. For all of the heat of condemnation of sexual deviancy and obsession with all things sexuality, there is precious little light given in terms of how to well and actively encourage healthy sexuality among Christians (a major catalyst behind my upcoming theology of sexuality writing).

Barb Winters, a sister in Christ, has written a guidebook based on her own life experiences in Sexpectations: Helping the Next Generation Navigate Healthy Relationships (galley received as part of early review program). She details, in broad strokes, how she grew up without the healthiest of understanding of relationships and sexuality and the trials and difficulties which attended it: a first marriage that ended, ability to enter into a second marriage and create a “blended” family, navigating how to overcome the traumas from the earlier relationships and developing a healthy relationship, and thus working to encourage her children in their understanding of sexuality and healthy relationships.

Much of the book centers on how one of the author’s sons developed and struggled with a pornography addiction/obsession (the author tends to use the former term; the latter may better reflect the reality) which led him toward isolating behaviors and which led to significant relational damage. The author describes how her son came to recognize the difficulties with his obsession and how he worked to resist it, the steps she and her son both took in order to heal and repair the relationship, and how he is working toward healthier relationships.

The author has a generally positive opinion of millennials and zoomers, and she has identified “hookup culture” and pervasive pornography as significant challenges they face. The challenge of pervasive pornography is certainly present, cannot be denied, and unfortunately, a struggle not a few Christians are presently losing without a whole lot of healthy resources at hand beyond the less-than-inspiring exhortation to just be and do better. I do not doubt “hookup culture” remains a thing and requiring addressing, but I have to wonder if the level of concern better reflects the conditions Generation X and the earlier millennials experienced in the 90s and 00s. It would seem the later millennials and zoomers are not nearly as physically sexually active as those who came before then, no doubt partially because of major parenting changes, but also no doubt because of pornography.

This is another one of those books in which the subtitle is far more accurate regarding the substance than the title, and focus on the title alone will lead the reader to not fully understand what the author is attempting to do. As a practical guide this work provides a lot of advice and ideas rooted in some experience for those seeking to encourage younger people to cultivate healthy relationships.

Probably not a book I would purchase, but as the topics covered within the book were of interest to me I thought I would try it. I think as someone who is decidedly agnostic this book is kind of like being preached out on things you don't particularly need a belief in religion in to begin with? As I say the book was not for me, but if you're looking for a book on this topic with a religious flavour then it's probably for you?

Every parent should read!!! Barb Winters does an EXCEPTIONAL job in using her own flaws and faults, actual scientific evidence and studies, plus a whole lot of Gospel truth, to detail how we can go about teaching and growing up children in purity. Even though I'm not a parent, I found myself taking notes to share with those I mentor, to share in sermon messages I prepare and just to keep for my own walk in purity. Though at times it got a bit elemental, and would feel like a foundation class in things we already know, I appreciated her thorough approach and her openness from her own life and that of her family. The book covers a wide gamut in the area of sex and sexuality, and also dives into necessary habits for healthy relationships and how to manage when relationships have been affected and need restoration. It was a solid read and I will be sharing with the parents and church leaders I know!

I appreciate the author’s approachability when discussing the topics of teen sexuality and pornography. As a parent of now adult children, I remember how challenging it was to bring up the subject without my sons cutting jokes or shutting down completely. Barb shares simple conversation starters spoken in the language of today’s youth to help parents introduce the conversation. Written from a faith-based perspective, I am grateful also for her generous use of Scriptures to guide parents in the wisdom of God’s word.

Sexpectations is a timely book in which Barb Winters addresses the difficult subjects of pornography, sexting and hookup culture. From beginning to end, Barb graciously implores parents and those who work with youth/young adults that it is time to receive and then offer hope, healing, and direction to the next generation as they navigate healthy relationship in a sexually broken world. As Barb clearly states, we can’t bury our heads in the sand and hope that the current crisis goes away. The issues before us must be met with a willingness to confront our own shortcomings and brokenness as we enter into difficult conversations.

Sexpectations offers hope as Barb guides the reader with the latest brain science research, experience as a parent and risk avoidance specialist and ultimately the transforming power of Christ Himself. The pathway forward is spelled out as Barb writes, “When we talk about sex and sexuality with our children—yes, we must talk about it—let’s start with Christ and his redemptive power.”

“One of Sue’s sons moved in with his girlfriend.” This is literally the fifth sentence of Chapter 1 and it was in response to a generally question asking how Sue was doing. The problem here being that Sue was not actually present and this entire conversation can be classified as judgmental gossip … not exactly a virtue nor something I was expecting. Needless to say … this was a pretty rough start to what promised to be a controversial topic to begin with and I was immediately disappointed. Immediately after this, the author goes on a screed about the phrase “As long as you’re happy …” which for me is in the same passive aggressive category as “Bless your little heart …” but for the author apparently represents a capitulation of morals. What follows is a mostly anecdotal review of “hook-up culture” and online pornography before diving into what the author believes is driving this risky behavior: Self-Doubt, No Relationship with Christ, Everyone is Doing It … with the implication that addressing any one of these might short circuit the “perpetual cycle of unhealthy relationships.” … an opinion that is not well supported in the book (citations of actual studies are rare if they exist at all).

The author regains some traction in Section Two (2) with habits of healthy relationships; however, I am reasonable sure most people would accept these general habits prima facie. Chapter 5 gives us a list of relationship red flags and green flags that seemed reasonable and the sections on “love languages” even had some practical advice (although each section was very brief and mostly cursory). Chapter 6 on Communication was the best of the group and almost worth the effort to get there. Chapter 8 on reconciliation comes in a close second. Over all … the book was not what I expected nor ultimately very useful to me.

SECTION 1 - The Deterioration of Relationships
Chapter 1: As Long as You’re Happy
Chapter 2: Consequences of Unhealthy Choices

SECTION 2 - Habits for Healthy Relationships
Chapter 3: Love
Chapter 4: Selflessness
Chapter 5: Mutuality
Chapter 6: Communication

SECTION 3 -
Chapter 7: Healing from Wounds
Chapter 8: Reconciliation and Maintaining Healthy Relationships

I was given this free advance reader copy (ARC) ebook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.

#Sexpectations #NetGalley

The author doesn’t blush when addressing this intimate topic of healthy sexual relationships for tweens, teens, and young adults. With upfront boldness, Winters guides parents through the challenging issues of sex, sexuality, pornography, nude images, hookups, and all things online. You won’t find pat answers or worldly solutions for your child but the hope of healthy sexual, physical, and emotional relationships through applying biblical principles. For parents hesitant about approaching these personal subjects with their kids, the text will guide the conversations and offer abundant grace when a child or we mess up. A must-read for today’s hypersexualized times!

This is a fascinating and eye-opening read for parents who want to successfully navigate parenting in times where sexual norms are very different to their own experiences, particularly given the rise of technology over recent decades. It is written from a christian perspective, by an expert in this field. I found the book enormously helpful, and applaud the author for sharing anecdotes from her own journey - this made the book hugely readable and as such I found myself flying through it!

My thanks to NetGalley, author and publisher for the opportunity to review this book in exchange for an advance copy.