The word "codependent" has connotations that many people may reject the term in describing themselves but Terri Cole breaks it down in her book Too Much: A Guide to Breaking the Cycle of High-Functioning Codependency and shows that capable people can be codependent. Cole explains how codependent people aren't the helpless victims that society generally associates with the word by coining the term high-functioning codependent, she shows how these are the people that are constantly accommodating others wants/needs while neglecting their own. Her guide defines the term in much more detail to help readers determine if they identify as a "HFC", while looking at how HFC's are made, how they attract narcissists and explains how to break your codependent habits and establish boundaries and emotional resilience to keep those boundaries.

This book could not have come into my life at a better time! I've been on a self-healing journey and could relate to so much of this book that it was scary. I've always been the person that everyone relies on and turns to for help or to vent and conveniently also the scape goat for all the problems and mistakes- it's exhausting. I'm trying to use the tips and exercises from this book to create boundaries so that I don't have to feel so mentally exhausted and burnt out all the time trying to worry about others feelings when my actions are not toxic. My work environment is exceptionally toxic but where I have to be- so I've been taking applying this book to validate my feelings and create personal boundaries to not allow others words or actions to get to me as much. I'm truly doing a lot better mentally since I've read this book and cannot wait to buy the physical book so that I can take a bunch of notes and share it with family and friends.

While I always thank NetGalley, I'd like to give a special thank you to them and Sounds True Publishing for giving me an advanced copy of this life changing book in exchange for an honest review! I've already spoken about it with so many people and am eagerly waiting for the publishing date!

A nice book on codependency. Been working through generational trauma and this has helped with understanding things a little better.

I greatly enjoyed this book, both as a therapist and the target audience! I found the writing style easy to understand and relatable, especially the “Loving Reminders” and anecdotes sprinkled throughout. What I appreciated most is that the author provided numerous actionable and accessible steps to enact her recommendations. As I read, I was disappointed that this was an ARC because I have so many people in my life- family, friends, and clients- that I want to recommend it to!
However, there are a few observations that did result in a lower rating. These are pretty specific to my background, but would result in me giving qualifiers to my clients before encouraging them to read the book.
I would have appreciated better clarification for the readers between codependency and the DSM diagnosis of Dependent Personality Disorder. I also feel that Narcissism was not adequately explained and with it being quite a buzzword that is misinterpreted on social media, it would be more therapeutically responsible to define it. I also very much disliked the use of “narc” as shorthand for narcissist, especially because “narc” has a substance use connotation. Additionally, I feel that the author unintentionally alienates part of the audience by focusing on female-identifying readers. HFCs can be male-identifying or nonbinary and an appropriate language shift would be easy to make.
I look forward to seeing a more “polished” ebook version, as the Kindle version I downloaded had very weird spacing, jumbled lines and paragraphs, and frequently stated “on page X/TK” for the included exercises.
Overall, this is a great book and one that I will be very excitedly adding to my office library and recommending!