Member Reviews

This was a great read! As they mentioned in the book, I was part of the second generation to discover the show when it was on Netflix. One of my coworkers had watched the original run when it was airing so this show has a special place in my heart, not just for the show itself but for the community it created throughout a couple generations now.

Reading about Leisha and Kate's upbringing was insightful and gave us different perspectives on mid-west/east coast growing pains as LGBTQIA+ individuals. I didn't know anything about Leisha and Kate's past or personal life before this so everything was new to me and I'm interested in listening to their podcast as well.

This book is definitely a memoir of the two of them. If you're looking for insights into any of the other cast members viewpoints including their storylines and perspectives, they're not in here very much except for the ways in which they interacted with Kate and Leisha. That's not a bad thing, it's just that sometimes they'd mention a co-star and in my brain I'm thinking of that co-star's storyline at that point in the show and expecting them to discuss that but that wasn't the case since they weren't directly involved with that.

I loved the way the authors explored their personal relationships with the cast, especially learning more about Erin, Mia, and Sarah. I think Mia was the most surprising and I loved whenever they talked about her varied interests and pot-stirring antics.

This was a fun memoir and a great trip down memory lane with Kate and Leisha. It definitely made me want to rewatch the show with a new perspective on what it has done for represention throughout the LGBTQIA+ community.

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So good! I have loved Kate and Leisha since I was 15 and it’s no different now, 20 years later. I will buying a hard copy to keep as a trophy because I loved this book!

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This is a love letter to fans of The L Word. I found myself smiling as they mentioned stories surrounding some of my favorite moments from the show. I loved having a look into the lives of two of my favorite actresses!


Thank you to Netgalley & the publisher for an arc of this book in exchange for my opinion!

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I didn’t know how much I needed this book until I started reading this book. So Gay for You is like a perfect pair of pants. It’s comfortable, hugs you in all the right places, and covers you in warmth. This perfect mix of heartfelt, joyous, and informational thrums throughout the book as the chapters move from Leisha’s to Kate’s perspective or Kate’s to Leisha’s perspective. The editing here is masterful and the book itself feels more like a conversation between two best friends with the reader being welcomed into their world as if they were also part of Hailey’s and Moennig’s found family. Highly recommend.

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I’ve been smitten with Kate Moennig since Young Americans and, although I’ve only watched a handful of episodes of The L Word, Alice and Shane were by far my favorite characters, so I was excited to read about so I was excited to read about the actresses’ real life friendship. This was a wonderful mix of their personal journeys, romantic ups and downs, on-set experiences, and the found family they forged with the cast. I loved how their friendship has continued to flourish, even after the show and the reboot ended. I definitely recommend this to anyone who loves the actors, The L Word, or the PANTS podcast.

I received an advanced copy from the publisher and am voluntarily leaving this review.

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For a long time fan of the L word I loved seeing this perspective of the actors! This memoir is wonderful it has all the personality of the characters with a lot of good life lessons and LGBTQ representation which is so needed in todays day and age! I loved it!

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This was such a fun read! I loved learning about the experiences of two queer icons from the early 2000s!

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This is an incredibly well-written book with a lot of very interesting anecdotes. It's so fun to hear about their lives, friendships, and some behind the scenes stories from the show. Their voices work really well together and the whole book had a great flow.

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Grab your bestie and hop on your bike, this book is taking you for a ride.

Leisha Hailey and Kate Moennig don't just take readers behind the scenes of their hit show The L Word, they reveal little slices of their queer history from times that many people only hear about as sweeping generalizations of what that time was like. They welcome us into their childhoods and formative years in New York City, and show us what The L Word really meant to them.

As someone who watched The L Word in secret when it was on Netflix, watching a few episodes and then discreetly deleting it from the watch history (Because I'm still old enough to have watched this on Netflix before profiles were a thing) I could not wait to pick this book up. A warning for readers: if you're precious about your opinions about this show, be prepared for Hailey and Moennig to disagree with you. They talk about the show with a lot of care, fondness, and love, but if something doesn't sit right with them now, they do not pull punches about how they feel. They provide and honest yet nostalgic take on what it was like working up in Canada in their Gay Camp filming this beloved show.

This books is raw and heartbreaking at times while it manages to keep you gripped by the behind the scenes stories and opening up more about what it was really like to create such a groundbreaking show. It's so much more than a book about a show. It's about what that experience meant to these women, and that's the best thing of all.

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Thank you NetGalley and Publisher for allowing me to read and review this book.

I love Kate Moenning, and this book doesn't disappoint.

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I knew I had to read this memoir the moment I saw it.

The L Word played a pivotal role in my life growing up. It was the first time I had watched a show with lesbian characters (and so many of them at that!) I wasn't out yet when I started watching, and I remember sitting in my bedroom with the door locked so that my mom wouldn't accidentally walk in (if she tried to come in I always used the excuse that I was "changing"). I was absolutely hooked on the show and the characters.

I had a feeling reading So Gay For You would be nostalgic. I didn't expect to feel so much warmth, love, and frank honesty. Each chapter contained both Kate and Leisha's narratives (sometimes swapping a few times). They cover the events prior to, during, and after The L Word.. Reading through I could practically hear their voices in my head (especially Leisha's humor). There was so much fondness and nostalgia from both of them. I loved seeing how strong their friendship was and continues to be. And not only with them but the rest of the cast. I could tell how much love they have for The L Word and how much fun everyone had together.

I also appreciated that they did not hesitate to discuss the aspects of The L Word that haven't aged so well. The problematic parts of the show were not swept under the rug. I appreciated their candidness when discussing Next Gen (it seems that their sentiments were similar to mine).

I loved being able to see snippets into their lives and the growth that's happened over the years and how The L Word was a part of that. I felt particularly empathetic to Kate's perspective. Being young when I watched the show, I saw Kate's character Shane as being cool and confident. I was envious of the way she appeared so at ease with her sexuality. I did not know Kate's personal background. As I got a lot of comfort from Shane during that time, I get a lot of comfort now as an adult to her own experiences and some of the similarities to my own.

Overall, I found So Gay for You to be nostalgic, cathartic, and full of joy. It highlights queer friendship that stands the test of time. It truly feels like a love letter to The L Word but also to all those that were part of the show and made it what it was to so many queer individuals during that time. To me, the show will always hold a spot of importance in queer media.

Thank you NetGalley and St. Martin's Press for a copy of this book. This review was left voluntarily and contains only my honest opinions.

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This let me take a step back in time to the first time I watched the l word! It was so fun to take a look inside the cast. It was funny and hopeful and made me want more!!

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Back in the early 2000s, Leisha Hailey and Kate Moennig—unknowns trying to break into Hollywood—both showed up for an audition. They clicked. Moennig got the part...but the writers worked Hailey into the show as well, and a friendship—to say nothing of a hella memorable show—was born.

"Every day, between 8:30 and 9:00 a.m., one of us calls the other for a morning check-in. Like clockwork, my wife[...] will hand me the phone and say, without a hint of resentment, not even looking up from her New York Times, "It's your other wife."" (loc. 3083*)

I watched maybe two seasons of "The L Word" at the time (rather behind release schedule, I imagine). This was back when, if you wanted to watch something you didn't otherwise have access to, someone who understood the Internet better than I did burned you a DVD. (I'm neither justifying this nor recommending it, but my family did not have television, it was the early 2000s in a red state, and teenaged me would literally not have known where to find this show through more above-board means.) Even as a teenager who had watched precious little television, I knew it was not good television, and yet: how could you look away? Teenaged me had scoured Alison Bechdel's "Fun Home" to make a list of every queer book she mentioned and take that list to the library. I found maybe two of the books on the list, and at least one of those books was wildly depressing. Books that celebrated queerness were hard to find and shows even harder to find (even if you had television). And here were Moennig and Hailey and the rest of the cast presenting queerness as something that was just *there*, (mostly) not as coming-out stories or trauma but as romance and drama and found family. And two decades later—without, let's be honest, any intention of ever going back and watching the rest of the show**—I'm still here for it.

So this is absolutely a book for readers for whom "The L Word" meant something or means something. It's a look beyond the ripped DVD at what it was like to make the show and with it redefine part of queer culture. Hailey and Moennig write through a lot of the plot points of the show, and you don't need to be intimately familiar with the show to follow it (again: I've seen maybe two seasons, twenty years ago); I'd still recommend the book to other curious readers and particularly to baby queers who are too young to have caught the first "L Word" wave. But at its core...this is a love letter to a time and place and context and found family.

*Quotes are from an ARC and may not be final.

**Nothing personal, "L Word", I just still don't watch TV

Thanks to the author and publisher for providing a review copy through NetGalley.

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Fun, cute, if ultimately lightweight celebrity memoir. It captures a fleeting moment in LGBT history, and for that is notable.

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This book felt like a blast from the past and I felt like I got a sneak peek into the behind-the-scenes of a show that was cutting edge during my developmental years. It was such a lovely nostalgic throwback. I loved seeing the journey Leisha Hailey and Kate Moennig went on to get to the L Word and beyond.

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Thank you to the publisher and authors for this galley! It was interesting to hear about the creation of The L Word and The L Word: Generation Q from two of the main cast. I think the book was at its best when sharing little details viewers wouldn’t otherwise know and heartfelt memories from the authors. I thought the format was confusing at times, as both perspectives have similar voices, and it was often hard to tell who was speaking without context or flipping backwards. I liked that the authors filled in what they were doing before and after the shows, and peeled back the veneer of glamorous Hollywood.

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i just started watching the L word and when i saw this, i knew i needed it immediately! to hear about these stories from their real life perspectives gave me so much depth and insight into not only their characters but their personal lives outside of the show. i absolutely loved reading this and to anyone who would like to (regardless of seeing the show) should def read it!!

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Wait. Stop. This was fantastic! I went into this expecting a brief, behind-the-scenes peek at The L Word, but Kate and Leisha didn’t just crack the door open—they flung it wide and dragged me into every single aspect of the whole damn thing.

Seriously, I don’t think I could have asked for a better memoir from these two. It hit all the marks: their childhoods, their early careers, their auditions, the show, the between-seasons drama, life after The L Word, the reboot, the disappointment of the reboot, their White House experiences (casual flex), their podcast, their relationships—everything. And it was all written in a way that felt raw, hilarious, and deeply personal.

Now, as a 44-year-old mom of two with my wife, I can say I was deep in the trenches of The L Word fandom when it first aired. Back in my early 20s, I never missed an episode and attended more than my fair share of lesbian watch parties in Center City Philadelphia—just blocks away from where Kate grew up. That show was everything, no matter how wild the plotlines got or how much Generation Q let me down. And after reading this? I really wish Kate and Leisha had been given more control over the reboot. I have zero doubt they would have made it the successful revival we all wanted.

In the end, this book left me wanting to rewatch the original L Word (again) and finally dive into their podcast. Also—shocking plot twist—I now find myself drawn more to Leisha rather than doubling down on my 20+ year Kate crush. Growth? Who knows.

Huge thanks to NetGalley and St. Martin’s Press for the advanced copy so that I could give my honest feedback and review. You knocked this one out of the park.

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As a longtime fan of The L Word, I was eager to read this book, and it did not disappoint. More than just a memoir, this book offers a compelling look at what it was like to be a queer actress on a groundbreaking queer show at a time when LGBTQ+ representation in mainstream media was still met with significant resistance.

Kate Moennig, best known for her portrayal of Shane, provides fascinating insights into her experiences on the show, as well as the challenges and triumphs of working on a series that was, remarkably, staffed largely by women. The behind-the-scenes details about the production process, creative decisions, and roadblocks the cast and crew faced added depth to my understanding of The L Word's impact.

While I was previously hesitant to watch the reboot, this book’s candid discussion of the continuation—especially from the perspective of two original cast members—has encouraged me to approach it with a more informed perspective. This book is a must-read for fans of the show, but it also holds value for anyone interested in the evolution of queer representation in television.

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Thank you to St. Martin's Press and NetGalley for this ARC! As far as memoirs go, this was a must-read for me. I'm a long-time, somewhat frenzied fan of The L Word (dedicated enough to watch the very divisive reboot Gen Q) and have always felt a pull to any and all media related to the show. I have a copy of Jennifer Beals photobook "The L Book" and it is a prized possession. My love for the show aside, I thought Leisha and Kate's braided narrative about how their individual lives lead up to landing roles on the show and the evolution of their friendship since then was a joy to read. I loved the inside glimpses into what went on as they made the show, and learning about them as individuals before and after it ended.

As much as I enjoyed reading it, at times the transitions between perspectives were a bit abrupt. I also would have liked to see them both go a bit further in their inspection or remembrances of the past. I would have been fine with a longer book if it meant seeing them dive beyond the surface and get more into the nitty gritty details to make a memory feel more fleshed out. I like fearless, confessional memoirs that go all out.

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