Dance or Die

Becoming a dedicated dancer in an active war zone- both at home, with violent parents, and in the Middle East. Most of the book graphically describes the horrific abuses, and yet Joudeh finds his salvation in dance, and his passion never wavers.

If there is one thing I know for sure, it's that this is a story that will stay with me for a long time to come. Ahmad takes us on an amazing journey, one we can hardly imagine. The hardship, the horrors of war, the awful things he witnessed and what his eyes must have seen...And still, he never gave up. He had a dream, and he kept on chasing that dream, needing to believe that one day that dream would become reality.

Ahmad grows up in Syria, in Camp Yarmouk, where he lives as a stateless refugee. As a child he discovers the art of dancing. It will tear his family apart; his father doesn't approve, and so his mother takes Ahmad's side and helps him to go to dance class. Eventually it's one of the reasons his family breaks up. The other one is the war. Ahmad receives death threats if he doesn't stop dancing, but it's something he can never do. He even tattoos the words in his neck, on the exact place a blade will decapitate him if he'll be caught by the extremists: Dance or Die. It's how he feels; he'd rather die than stop dancing. It's his life, his refuge, it's his art. The way he describes what dancing did (and does) to him, is just beautiful. It's freedom.
When he gets the chance to dance in the Arabian version of So You Think You Can Dance, he travels to Beirut to participate in the show, but (possibly) due to political reasons, he has to leave the show before he's able to reach the finals. He returns to Damascus, where he wants to finish his study.
A new chance for escape comes along when he posts a video of himself on youtube, dancing on the roof of a building in dangerous territory, surrounded by his enemies, the people who want to take his art away from him. It's as if he is challenging them, showing them his strength and his bravery. He'll never bow or bend for the people who tell him he is not allowed to dance anymore.
It offers him a new chance: a Dutch journalist saw his video and contacts him. Together they make a documentary ('Dance or Die') in Syria; Ahmad dances again in Yarmouk, he dances at the stage of the Roman Theater in Palmyra before IS destroys it. The documentary wins an Emmy award.
It's his gateway to freedom. A chance to follow his dream and dance.
With a student visa, Ahmad travels to Europe, to Amsterdam. It's a chance he takes, even when it means he has to leave his loved ones behind. Even though the change in culture is a shock for him, he manages to make a life for himself. He dances for the Dutch National Ballet, he dances in other cities around the world. He's made his dream come true by staying strong and never giving up hope. He's a true example of what faith can bring you, even though he must have had days he was ready to give up. Which is only human.
This is a story of strength, of determination and hope. Of bravery and faith. It's an incredible one and it's one that I won't forget.

The book tells Ahmad's journey from discovering his love to dance, to his new life in Amsterdam. It tells about the horrors of war, the family that was torn apart. But it also tells of how much he loved his life in Syria before the war took everything away, of the love he has for his mother and a very special friend. In between the lines you read about his grief, about his solitude, about his fears and also about the horrors his eyes have seen, even though it's not explicitly mentioned everywhere. But it's there and even though we all have seen the images of that war on TV, it's still unimaginable to think of what Ahmad really must have been through while living that every day life, where everything he once knew, was taken away from him. Gone.
I admire him for his strength and the courage he had to follow his dreams. He is a beautiful, unique and extraordinary dancer, and I hope the world will be able to watch him perform for a long time to come.

Highly recommended.

I am glad I read this book and have learned a lot about the Syrians affected by ISIS terrorism was well as displaced Palestinians who had to then flee again, which was something I did not have an extensive background knowledge on previous. I also enjoyed learning more about what male dancers or other cultural artists may face in countries where gender norms and roles are still very heavily expected. I’m not sure if it had to do with the native languages of the author or his relative inexperience writing, but I found that the I couldn’t really connect emotionally with the writing. It wasn’t poorly written by any means, but there were many times where I just felt like I wanted more storytelling. As a dancer, I know the author can convey his stories and journeys on stage, but I feel there is room for growth in his sharing of stories in written form. That being said, I commend the author in bringing forth his story as it is one we can definitely learn from, especially when we take the peace and freedoms we have in our countries for granted. I am so appreciative of the published and netgalley for giving me the opportunity to read and review this book.

Beautiful, touching narrative... I loved this reading, I've been reading a lot of dancers' biographies lately, and I thought maybe this one will be another one about the life of a dancer in a company, the days of a professional dancer, like most of the books that I recently read. But this one, it's not about the life of a dancer, it's about the dancer in life so hard to imagine for someone like me that has everything: food, home, nationality, peace... So many things that we usually take for granted. This book was everything I didn't expect but I always look for. Stories with meaning, about dancers doing art for a cause, communicating, inspiring others, not only for dance but for living. The strength and commitment of Ahmad with his family, nation, and dance it's admirable. I truly recommend this book to anyone looking for a story of an artist using art as a tool to transform, to find the humanity and the meaning of life.