What Is Compersion?

"Dr. Marie Thouin’s not just a researcher, she's a philosopher. In her remarkable new book, What Is Compersion?, Thouin unlocks the transformative potential of the simple act of noticing how the joy you can receive from your partner’s delight can empower you in so many ways, serving to disempower jealousy and territoriality. Thouin’s research demonstrates how the world could look from the point of view of compersion, and how taking joy in your partner’s (or friend’s or relations of any kind’s) happiness can bring joy to you in all of your relationships.

If you are a seeker of sexual freedom and clean love, as I hope you are, for heaven’s sake read this book. And then go shine the light of compersion on your lovers, friends, family, and everyone you care about." -- Dossie Easton, LMFT, coauthor with Janet W. Hardy of The Ethical Slut

"Who knew compersion comprised an entire universe? This book is absolutely riveting! I just kept turning the page because I could not wait to find out what Marie Thouin was going to say next about compersion! I promise you that you will be up all night reading all 278 pages of this fantastic book, as you will not be able to put it down! This is truly the complete story and covers everything you ever wanted to know about compersion, plus a lot more knowledge that you didn't even realize you absolutely needed." -- Kathy Labriola, counselor, nurse, author of Polyamorous Elders: Aging in Open Relationships

"Drawing from solid research, Thouin breaks down the nuts and bolts of how compersion actually works—the mindset, context, and special sauce that facilitate this often misunderstood concept. Whether you're non-monogamous yourself, a professional helping clients, or just a curious human, this book is an essential look at the potential of our hearts to share in each other's joy. Thouin's work pushes us to explore uncharted territory in how we experience intimacy and connection."-- Dedeker Winston, author of Multiamory: Essential Tools for Modern Relationships and The Smart Girl's Guide to Polyamory

"Marie Thouin has been at the vanguard of compersion research for a decade, and her book is destined to become a classic. What Is Compersion? boldly and compassionately presents both the first evidence-based model of compersion and a plethora of practical tools to cultivate this jealousy-transforming positive emotion in everyday life. Regardless of whether you lean toward monogamy or polyamory (or somewhere in-between), this groundbreaking book will assist you to achieve freer and more-fulfilling intimate relationships—and to open your heart beyond what both culture and history have considered possible." -- Jorge N. Ferrer, PhD, author of Love and Freedom: Transcending Monogamy and Polyamory

"Marie Thouin offers a deep and compelling dive into compersion as it is understood and experienced by people in consensually non-monogamous relationships. The voices of her research participants come through loud and clear, and Thouin handles their experiences with nuance, clarity, and empathy. There is much about all relationships, not just consensually non-monogamous ones, to glean from this important book. Whether you are currently practicing consensual non-monogamy, curious about consensual non-monogamy, or want to bring positive empathy to your monogamous relationship, this book is a must-read." -- Mimi Schippers, Tulane University; author of Polyamory, Monogamy, and American Dreams and Beyond Monogamy: Polamory and the Future of Polyqueer Sexualities

"One of the most difficult aspects of approaching consensual non-monogamy is unlearning notions of competition and ownership in relationships. Part of that difficulty is that we don't often have specific resources or models for success in that regard. Dr. Marie Thouin is tackling that head-on, and it's a long time coming." -- Kevin A. Patterson, MEd, author of Love's Not Color Blind

"Dr. Marie Thouin illuminates the transformative and enriching power of compersion. Through relatable stories and deeply researched wisdom, her insightful exploration guides readers toward fostering trust, intimacy, and boundless love in all their relationships!" -- Joli Hamilton, PhD, MHC, CSE, founder of the Year of Opening; author of Project Relationship