The Path to Self-Love

I received this book for free. This does not impact my review in any shape or form. 

The Path to Self-Love by Ruby Dhal is a self-help book about bringing comfort to yourself and giving yourself grace despite the little ways the world tries to tear you down. Dhal delves into her past to explain the concept of healing and how discouraging it can be, despite the positivity it can bring to your life. At the end of each chapter, Dhal provides journaling exercises to help readers reflect on their past mistakes. 

I remember one client that was breaking down in front of me. She was overwhelmed by her PTSD symptoms and desperately asked if it was ever going to get better. She was in a bunch of online support groups for people who have experienced trauma, and for a while, I didn’t know what to say. Every time she came in it was either someone joking about killing themselves or complaining about how cruel the world can be. At the time, I wasn’t sure what to make of it. I wish I could’ve told her that it was okay and that there was nothing wrong with feeling overwhelmed, and eventually, the feeling would pass. But I didn't have a whole lot of experience. All I could do at the time was listen. 

So I appreciate how safe Dhal makes the readers feel just through her tone alone. She addresses the nuances of mending mental and emotional scars and the difficulties that come with it. A lot of what she says endorses practices such as mindfulness and accepting that, sometimes, having a growth mindset isn’t enough to change your situation. One quote that I will always appreciate from Dhal is that “healing won’t act as an anesthetic that makes you numb. Instead, it will bring the pain to you and teach you how to live with it.” Fortunately, or unfortunately depending on who you ask, there is no balm for wounds of the heart. It’s just a matter of building your perseverance enough with loved ones and life to where, while you’re not always happy, you’re okay.

A side note: I love how Dhal incorporates her culture into her lessons and shows how we can abuse ourselves from the most unlikely sources. South and Southeast Asia fat indeed shame people they think are fat because they believe it'll make the person better. The fact that colorism is present in all communities, especially my own, also lends to America’s comfort with racism. It's not a good thing per se, but it's something we all have to acknowledge.

The thoughts Dhal discusses have ties to dialectical behavioral therapy; you can hold two seemingly opposing ideas in your mind and both can be true (i.e. you can heal and hurt simultaneously). Moreover, everyone’s trying the best they can with what they’ve got, even the ones who engage in the aforementioned fat shaming and colorism. It’s what they grew up with, and that, in and of itself, can be a safety mechanism. But one of the most powerful techniques that Dhal implements here is her self-disclosures. She didn’t hold back even though her community may not like it. I hope my loved ones, myself included, can build up to that courage. 

If I could go back in time, I would probably give my client this book. But I can’t, so I’ll just recommend it to others who need it.

What an empowering story. Inspirational and motivational. One that pulled at my heart strings and reminded me how beautiful this life we get to live is. Self love is such an important aspect to our lives and this story touched on that beautifully!

This was such a beautiful read. I've followed Ruby Dhal on Instagram for a long time and this book was cathartic to read through. This isn't poetry, but a self help book. I really enjoyed the excercises she lays out and thought that the last section on social media was so relevant and rewarding to read.

Thanks to NetGalley and Penguin Random House for the ARC.

I enjoyed the information that the author shared in this book. I have been practicing self-care for years and feel like I have come along way with my personal healing. I was all for the tips and guidance from the author. It was presented in a positive tone and an easy to understand manner. Thanks to NetGalley for the ARC.